EARLY MORNING LATE NIGHT HUMOR FROM JAY LENO

Last night I almost stayed up late enough to see Jon Stewart but passed out with the TV on (writing that just now reminded me to listen to the Dictators' song "Sleeping With the TV On" from Manifest Destiny and I can safely report that it sounds as incredible in 2006 as it did when they first recorded it in 1977) after SOUTH PARK. Anyway, the first e-mail I opened this morning, from my friend Peggy had a couple of great Leno jokes that gave me an early morning chuckle. I hope you'll get a kick out of 'em too.

"The Supreme Court confirmation hearings are under way for Judge Sam Alito. Democrats want to know his position on privacy. Republicans want to know his position on prison terms for bribery."

and

"Indicted congressman Tom Delay has announced he is resigning as House Majority Leader.  However, he's still going to run for re-election. So apparently he feels he is too corrupt to be a leader but not too corrupt to be just a congressman."

I wonder if jokes like this will cause far right windbag and professional Fox "News" liar Stuart Varney to boycott Leno. A few days ago he subbed for another reprehensible right-wing propagandist, Neil Cavuto, and after complaining about "essentially leftist movies" produced by Hollywood, went on to whine that there "has got to be a lot of people like me who will not go to see people who insulted my president in the year 2004 and that election. I cannot divorce their talent from their political views." This all took place on a gripping and lurid Faux News expose called "Hollywood Bush-bashing!," basically a discussion between the execrable Varney and homophobic bigot and right-wing blogger Tom O'Neil. Reactionary O'Neil babbled on about the inappropriateness of using Jon Stewart as a host for the upcoming Academy Awards show and declared that the 2006 Academy Awards will be "the most political Oscars in years" and that 3 faves BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN, TRANSAMERICA and CAPOTE are "gay films." (I guess CAPOTE is a "gay film" in his twisted little teensy weensy mind because the author is homosexual. I bet he has missed a lot of great literature... which explains a lot about his work.)