CH-CH-CH-CHANGES... IT WILL BE A VERY DIFFERENT WASHINGTON COME JANUARY 2009

January 2009 is shaping up to be the year with the biggest turnover in Washington in well over a decade, certainly far greater than 2006. Not only will the White House and the Executive Branch be ready for a thorough detoxification, but it certainly apperars that both houses of Congress will see huge changes. And the changes will be in one direction-- as it was in 2006-- lots and lots of Republicans moving from Congress to K Street. Former GOP leaders like Planet Denny Hastert and Deborah Pryce have already announced their impending retirements, as have Republicans like Senator Wayne Allard (CO) House members Chip Pickering (MS) and Ray LaHood (IL). Expected to join the cavalcade of retirees from the House are shady members under FBI investigation like Jerry Lewis (CA), John Doolittle (CA), Rick Renzi (AZ) and possibly Don Young (AK), as well as elderly Republicans like Dave Hobson (OH), C.W. Bill Young (FL), Elton Gallegly (CA), Mike Castle (DE), Don Manzullo (IL), Bartlett (MD), John McHugh (NY), JoAnn Davis (VA) and Ralph Hall (TX). On top of that Tom Davis (VA) may give up his blue-trending House district in northern Virginia to wage a pointless camapign for the U.S. Senate, something also being considered by Iowa extremist/psychopath Steve King.

Over on the Senate side, John Warner (VA) seems to be headed towards retirement and is likely to be succeeded by Democrat Mark Warner. Pete Domenici, who was seen wandering around Congress dazed and confused in his underpants, is clearly senile and being investigated for an illegal demand he made to US Attorney David Iglesias, one of the lynchpins of the cirrrent PurgeGate investigation. Also trending senile is Alaska's king of corruption Ted Stevens who is likely to be indicted on bribery charges before the election. Idaho's closeted hypocrite Larry Craig was caught in a public toilet having sex with a man and as this becomes more and more known in Idaho, it becomes more likely that he will retire. It's unclear whether or not Lindsey Graham (SC) and Chuck Hagel (NE) will survive neo-fascist primary challenges. Hagel can probably bounce back-- although he may retire-- and Graham's far right Republican opponent was arrested for cocaine distribution and is hiding out in a country club/rehabilitation center, although even in a state as backward and low-info as South Carolina, his chances at a successful run for public office have been greatly diminished.

On top of all the retirements, several Republicans up for re-electionare extremely vulnerable because of their astoundingly rubber stamp voting records in states where Bush's approval ratings have plummeted. Most likely to be defeated at the polls are John Sununu (NH), Norm Coleman (MN), Susan Collins (ME), Mitch McConnell (KY), Gordon Smith (OR) and any of the potential retirees above who decide to not get out gracefully. Incredibly even red state rubber stamps like James Inhofe (OK), Elizabeth Dole (NC) and John Cornyn (TX) could wind up in very tight races.

And, just to rub their noses in dirt, the Democrat mostly likely to retire, Luis Gutierrez (IL), announced today-- on the same day that Haster confirmed that he's going bye-bye-- that he will be staying in Congress.

Meanwhile Republicans who are actually safe-- mostly because of the composition of gerrymandered districts in extremely low-information areas often doiminated by religionist figures and consumed with superstitions, general backwardness and easily aroused nativism-- are embarrassments to their part in general. A perfect example is extremist maniac Doug Lamborn (CO). Last year 664 Blue America members contributed almost $7,000 to try to help Jay Fawcett stop one of the furthest right nutcases running for Congress. Unfortunately, Jay only managed to garner 41% of the vote in this red, red district south of Denver. Lamborn has gone on to win Freshman Loon of the Year, accumulating the absolute #1 worst and most reactionary voting record in the entire U.S. Congress, giving him a ranking marginally worse than neo-fascists Jim Jordan (OH), David Davis (TN), Patrick McHenry (NC), Adrian Smith (NE), Eric Cantor (VA), and Michele Bachmann (MN). Republicans in backward districts like CO-05 are rarely embarrassed by voting records even as extreme and out of whack as Lamborn's. However, as David Sirota pointed out in the Denver Post earlier this week, even sane Republicans don't approve of blaming our troops for Bush's disaster in Iraq-- which is just what Lamborn did.

He had the audacity to tell U.S. troops serving in Iraq that "If we want to win this war, we can"-- a not-so-subtle suggestion that, with us not exactly winning yet he thinks the big problem in Iraq is not the Bush administration's mismanagement, not the Republican Congress's longtime refusal to perform any oversight of the war whatsoever-- but that American troops don't yet have a sufficient desire to win.

David Bowie, on the other hand, sang about exactly what is needed to win: