TONIGHT'S HOMOEROTIC EPISODE OF THE LIFESTYLES OF THE RICH AND REPUBLICAN: I WONDER IF DOBSON WILL ALLOW McCAIN TO BRING SOME LUBE
Saturday I did a little run-down of how the far far right looks at the prospective Republican presidential field and I mentioned that GOP theocrat-in-chief, James Dobson would rather commit public sodomy with Mark Foley, Ken Mehlman, Jim Kolbe, Jim McCrery, Phil English, David Dreier, and Jim West's corpse than vote for John McCain-- or something to that effect. This morning they were babbling about it on CNN. "Kewl," I thought, especially coming right on top of another serious McCain-speaking-with-forked-tongue incident, which my pal Cliff Schecter wrote about so eloquently today. The straight-talking maverick got a little hoist on his own petard from a 1990 quote about Iraq much at variance with the bloodthirsty rantings he and his boyfriend Holy Joe Lieberman have been making of late. Then:
If you get involved in a major ground war in the Saudi desert, I think support will erode significantly. Nor should it be supported. We cannot even contemplate, in my view, trading American blood for Iraqi blood." [New York Times Aug 19, 1990]
"Blood; give me blood! More blood!" (Or something to that effect.)
Perhaps Lieberman can intercede with Dobson for McCain. Or maybe Dobson will be mollified with McCain's baying for blood every night on Fox. Whatever the case, McCain is determined to sew up the religionist right vote and get Dobson on the team the same way he bought off Jerry Falwell. Dobson really hates McCain-- I mean really hates his guts the way only a self-professed make believe prophet can hate-- and his support will not go as cheaply as Falwell's. His exact quote, in fact, was "I would not vote for John McCain under any circumstances... He is not in favor of traditional marriage and I pray that we will not get stuck with him." Amen, brother Jimmy!
McCain says he's got plenty of religionist nuts and kooks in his pocket already but that he wants to "have a dialogue" with Dobson (meaning: "should I concentrate on the head or the shaft?") That John Amato at Crooks & Liars is so partisan; he never lets a poor wingnut live down anything!
UPDATE: FINALLY, MOVEON TAKES OFF THE GLOVES AND SOCKS IT TO McCAIN
First watch the MoveOn video telling the truth about McCain escalation policies. Then wait a day or two and watch the McCain propaganda squad start screaming about how MoveOn is "out of the mainstream" and how they compared Bush to Hitler (a good comparison but one MoveOn never made). Like most Americans-- though not McCain, of course-- MoveOn opposes the War in Iraq and McCain wants a wider and bloodier war, McCain doesn't like people telling the truth about him; it's bad for the carefully crafted image. Dobson doesn't get much right but he sure is right to be praying that "we will not get stuck with him."
UPDATE: McCAIN TO DOBSON: "NO RUBBER/NO BJ/NO EXCEPTIONS"
Actually what McCain really said is that he's never had a single conversation with Dobson in his entire life and that he has no intention of calling him now that Dobson has announced that he's praying that America not get stuck with McCain. Apparently Adam's little illustration (above) wasn't the only commentary pointing out what a kiss-ass McCain can be when he sees that presidential apple dangling in front of him.