Midnight Meme Of The Day!

by Noah

Rick Santorum and Russian spy Maria Butina. How bought and sold do you have to be to smile and eagerly pose, openly, no less, with a Russian spy?

After seeing this cuddly photo of these two lowlifes, it can no longer be surprising why Rick Santorum has been one of Traitor Don's biggest TV defenders any time questions about Trump's close relationships with Putin and assorted Russian oligarchs come up. Santorum, in fact, has been nothing short of a Trump surrogate. It might be time to confiscate his American passport and find out if he has a Russian one. While we're at it, do the same with the entire NRA leadership.

Post-Trump, America Needs Something Better Than Another Back To Normalcy President

It would be a tragic mistake for Democrats to pick a 2020 nominee based solely on ousting Trump. Electability is always an important consideration but it should never-- not even now-- be the only consideration. Almost any reasonably decent candidate should be able to beat Trump. It's not about them; it's not even about Trump. It's about us. Is there a candidate offering us something we want from our government? Chances are, whomever can get it together to win the primary is going to beat Trump.

Right now wikipedia is keeping a running list of potential Democratic nominees. 6 have declared: ridiculous New Dem multimillionaire ex-Congressman John Delaney, Richard Ojeda, Michael Arth, Ken Nwadike (the Free Hugs Guy), Robby Wells and Andrew Yang. Washington Governor Jay Inslee and spiritual teacher and author Marianne Williamson have exploratory committees. And then there are two dozen who have "expressed interest," from Bernie and Biden to Oscar De La Hoya, Michael Bloomberg and Tracy Flick.

On CNN Sunday, the Democrats' great GOP ally Rick Santorum warned Jake Tapper that Democrats have to pick someone unexpected to win-- he'd probably like Beto or Alexandria, or maybe Richard Ojeda, Pete Buttigieg, or Julian Castro to be the nominee-- and not someone "expected." He said "When the Democrats win, they pick someone unexpected. Or someone that is not the favorite-- Bill Clinton, Barack Obama, Jimmy Carter-- when they pick John Kerry or Al Gore or Hillary Clinton, they lose. So I'm hoping for Bernie [Sanders] or Elizabeth [Warren] or somebody like that. Some tired, old-- Joe Biden, put them out there and we'll win. If they pick someone new then I think they have a chance." Another Tapper guest, Illinois Republican Adam Kinzinger, said it couldn't be anyone "far left" and then went on to define Nancy Pelosi and anyone who isn't from the Republican wing of the Democratic Party as being far left. He's sad that it's taking too long for the Democrats to transform themselves into the Eisenhower Republican Party while the GOP has moved so rapidly and decisively transforming themselves into a Hitlerite fascist party. Kinzinger was pumping for a nice safe corporate whore, Joe Biden and said he could beat Trump. "He can attract the kind of people voting for Donald Trump, the middle class, the blue-collar workers. I think he's the one that can take that away. If you put somebody like Bernie Sanders up, it's just out of the stream of what people want." Luckily Nina Turner was on the panel as well and she corrected both GOP doofuses: "Let me tell you something, wanting people to have a $15 an hour minimum wage, wanting to make sure that people have Medicare for all... there is no far-left, so don't paint Sanders and other people like that." Sure they do. Turner wants Democrats to win; Kinzinger and Santorium want Republicans to win. Is that so complicated?

2020 isn't just an opportunity to get rid of Trump. It's also an opportunity to replace him with someone as good as he is horrible-- with the great president America hasn't seen in over 7 decades! It's a chance to pick a candidate based on a vision for moving America forward. In 1920-- exactly a century ago-- the country went for a schlemiel who had a campaign theme everyone get behind: a return to normalcy (after the Great War). They wound up with a catastrophe: Warren G. Harding, the beginning of a downward spiral that led directly to the Great Depression and World War II. The Return to Normalcy candidate for the centenary is of course Joe Biden, the ultimate status quo or status quo ante candidate with nothing to offer except "not Trump."

Well-meaning Republicans-- not just sneaking partisans like Santorum-- will also be urging Democrats to nominate Biden or one of the other blind establishment centrists (say a Hickenlooper or, worse stir, a Bloomberg). Sunday night, at the 92nd Street Y in Manhattan, 2 "good" Republicans-- James Comey and Nicolle Wallace-- begged Democrats for a back to normalcy candidate. They hate Trump, although perhaps for somewhat different reasons than normal people hate Trump. They think he stole their putrid conservative party. They just want to bring back more putrid conservatism. That isn't what we want though, is it.

When CNN reports that "former FBI Director James Comey asked American voters Sunday night to end Donald Trump's presidency with a 'landslide' victory for his opponent in 2020," it sounds sweet to us. "All of us should use every breath we have to make sure the lies stop on January 20, 2021," said Comey, who "all but begged Democrats to set aside their ideological differences and nominate the person best suited to defeating Trump in an election. 'I understand the Democrats have important debates now over who their candidate should be,' Comey told MSNBC's Nicolle Wallace, 'but they have to win. They have to win.'" We know that but what comes after we win is important to us too.

Over the course of more than an hour, Comey repeatedly derided Trump's character, again likening the atmosphere around the President to what he saw in prosecuting mafia figures and suggested that Trump's tweets could eventually amount to witness tampering. Asked if Trump might be an unindicted co-conspirator in some of the crimes recently described by special counsel Robert Mueller, Comey said he didn't know, "but if he's not there, he's certainly close."

Still, Comey said he hoped that Trump would be swept out of office without being impeached. Framing the rise of Trumpism as a political ill the country needed to exorcise at the ballot, he expressed a hope that Americans would "in a landslide rid ourselves of this attack on our values."

"Removal by impeachment would muddy that," he said, and potentially leave a third of the country feeling like their chosen leader had been removed in a "coup."

Trump's decision to fire Comey in May 2017 was a key factor in the appointment of Mueller, who was handed the job by Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein in the aftermath of Comey's dismissal and the subsequent leak of a memo in which he recounted Trump asking that he end an investigation into former national security adviser Michael Flynn. In a book and in public statements, Comey has become a leading critic of Trump-- and Trump has berated him in turn, relentlessly and usually on Twitter.

Hours earlier, Trump attacked Comey in a pair of testy morning tweets, claiming without evidence that the former FBI chief had lied on Friday in his testimony to the House Judiciary and Oversight committees.

Comey laughed at the idea Trump had even looked over the actual testimony, joking to Wallace before she could read the tweets, "He's finished reading the 253 pages?"

After hearing the words out loud, he turned serious.

"My reaction to it is actually disturbing to me, which is kind of, 'Eh, there he goes again.' I thought I was 'Lyin' James Comey' now I'm 'Leakin' James Comey'. But I kind of shrug and sometimes smile and laugh about it and then I have a secondary reaction, which is to be horrified at my own numb reaction," Comey said. "We have to remind ourselves the President of the United States of America is publicly announcing that people are committing crimes, that they should be in jail."

Asked if Trump's tweets could be viewed as witness tampering, Comey answered carefully-- insisting he had no insight into Mueller's thinking.

"I'm not prepared to judge it," Comey said, "but again, if I were prosecuting a case in the Southern District of New York and a prominent person started attacking my witnesses, I'd want to know so what's going on there and does that cross the line from free speech, which we have to keep protected, into something else?"

Speaking about the period before the 2016 election, Comey was unsparing of Republican congressional leaders who he said opposed making public intelligence community concerns over Russian interference.

"To their everlasting shame, the leaders-- (Senate Majority Leader Mitch) McConnell, (House Speaker Paul) Ryan-- refused," Comey said. "I think they're going to have a hard time explaining that to history."

He had kinder words for former President Barack Obama, describing the Democrat as a foil to Trump in almost every way.

"I was struck that Barack Obama is the best listener as a leader I had ever seen and Donald Trump is the worst I've ever seen," Comey said. "Obama had the confidence to be quiet and try and get that. Donald Trump is a deeply, deeply insecure person, so I don't see any prospect that he would be able to be quiet for long enough to hear the truth."

Speaker... 2020?

Hillary surrogates used to whisper that if were was elected president he wouldn't be able to get anything through Congress because he hand allies there (other than Raul Grijalva, Keith Ellison, Tulsi Gabbard, Ro Khanna and Alan Grayson). Now there are way more than that behind Bernie and his programs and in 2020 there should enough to swing Congress towards the widely popular ideas he's running on, from Medicare-for-All and Job Guarantee to Free state universities and the Green New Deal. In 2020, we need to elect Bernie and and House ready for his programs. No more New Dems and Blue Dogs from the Republican wing of the Democratic Party.

Two silly-as-whoopie-cushions updates (a little early morning humor): Third Way wants Beto-- imagine a BETO/Lieberman ticket!!-- and, even more hilarious, Biden has been hiring DCCC staffers... which should be enough to guarantee him a sad, sad DOA campaign.

Midnight Meme Of The Day!

by Noah

Senator Rick Santorum (R-PA) has achieved 100% asshole status. Let's not rush to congratulate him, though. After all, being a Republican, he started out being 85% there to begin with. All he had to do was express his true inner self a little more to achieve his dream.

Appearing on CNN's State Of The Union on Sunday, Santorum, freaked out about the reality of 1,000,000 (mostly young) people participating in the March For Our Lives actions the day before, pretty much expressed the general attitude towards student daring to oppose being shot in their classrooms that is fashionable among Republicans when he said

How about kids, instead of looking to someone else to solve their problem, do something about taking CPR classes or trying to deal with situations that when there is a violent shooter that you an actually respond to that.

Notice that in Santorum's incredibly sick mind, the gun violence in schools is "their problem." To Republicans, it is not our problem as a nation, just theirs. This is Republican Condescension 101. I also can't help but notice that, although Santorum obviously aced his condescension course, he skipped his English classes. He therefore never learned about syntax or how to compose a coherent sentence. Nevertheless, his disturbing thoughts came through loud and clear. Oh, and how about the concept of a "violent shooter" in a school; as opposed to a non-violent shooter in a school, I presume.

Damn! Where do they get such dumbass arrogant people? The lowest of the low make it all the way to the U.S. Senate. Says a lot about Pennsylvania's idiot voters. Fuck you Rick Santorum. How about you learn something about human decency, and fuck you for now claiming you either didn't say what you said, or, "misspoke." I suppose what you were shown saying on live television was one more case of "fake news." Take your "Mr. Rogers as a psychotic act" and shove it up your ass where your head already resides.

Midnight Meme Of The Day!

-by Noah

For yesterday's meme, I threw a glaring prison yard spotlight on the 22 Republican creeping lowlife senators who, led by Mitch McConnell, voted against the reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act back in 2013. You can consider today's meme Part 2. It too, reflects the basic attitude of Republicans towards women. It's not just about their legislation ideas. Groping is bad enough but, to them, as evidenced by Trump's own recorded statements, republicans just consider groping and forced kissing to be "foreplay."

You can start with the cretin in today's meme, Maine state representative Lawrence Lockman. As additional evidence, I offer the exact quotes from a few of our most disgusting lawmakers. I'm surprised that a psychotic like Paul Ryan hasn't introduced a bill to make rape legal. It would be so Taliban of him and his party of sociopathic knuckle-dragging cavemen. It would certainly fit the rest of his personality profile.

Here they are. You know there's a lot more where this came from. Some will be familiar to you as being from the lengthy catalog of the GOP's Greatest Hits. Others, not so much, but every bit as grotesque and heinous. I've added editorial comments in parenthesis for each of these sub-human morons. And, yes, there are bad Democrats, but this is about overwhelming percentages and an attitude that serves as a qualification of party membership every bit as much as being a racist does.

1. Clayton Williams (R-TX) - Rape is kinda like the weather. If it's inevitable, relax and enjoy it. (Texas. Say no more.)

2. Todd Akin (R-MO) - If it's a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut the whole thing down. (Oh, the mysteries of them female bodies!)

3. Rick Santorum (R-PA) - Rape victims should make the best of a bad situation. (It's bad enough that Santorum dresses like the neighborhood perv, but, apparently, he wants credit for admitting that rape is bad.)

4. Richard Mourdock (R-IN) - Even when life begins in that horrible situation of rape, it is something that God intended to happen. (Wow, that some god these republican talibanistas have!)

5. Jodie Laubenberg (R-TX) - In the emergency room, they have what's called rape kits where a woman can get cleaned out. (Saving the "best" for last. This one comes from a woman, but, like Clayton Williams, she is from Texas. Do you think she'd feel the same way if, one night, her fellow Texan offered her a ride home and stopped the car on a dark side street and raped her?)

Like I always say, context is everything. Given the above quotations from such republican luminaries as these, is it any wonder that something like a Senator Chuck Grassley (R-IA) can just laugh at the press about pedophilia when they ask about his support for Roy Moore? For all we know, rape of an underaged girl is the best rape of all, in the mind of a Republican.

Trump Has All The Dirt On Sweaty Little Rubio He Needs To Neutralize Him

Wednesday right-wing loon and religious nut Rick Santorum ended his presidential campaign, as expected, after finishing with basically no votes in Iowa. (Rand Paul, Mike Huckabee and Martin O'Malley also dropped out after failing dismally in Iowa. Chris Christie will likely wait until he's humiliated in New Hampshire before joining them, although not before doing his best to destroy the hated boy in the bubble.) What was interesting, at least marginally, about Santorum leaving the race was his endorsement of "a tremendously gifted young man," Marco Rubio. That came just in time for the hard-hitting expose of Rubio in the New York Observer, which is owned by Herr Trumpf's son-in-law, Jared Kushner (husband of Ivanka, son of Trumpf criminal crony Charles Kushner.

OK, so here's the haps. Like we saw Wednesday, the Kochs told Rubio he could be president if he'd show them he could effectively attack Herr. And since policy attacks-- "he's not a real conservative" and "he wants single payer"-- haven't proven to not work, it's got to be personal stuff. OK, like Coulter says, Rubio's a sweaty-- she means greasy-- little liar and he may be nervous about going mano-a-mano against Trumpf but his team has an opposition book of personal slimery to use against Trumpf. So Trumpf unleashed the son-in-law on Marco to give him a taste of what he can expect if he dares. "Marco Rubio: Poor Little Rich Boy Runs Into Real Estate Trouble" may sound innocuous enough... but the story isn't. Ken Silverstein's sub-headline is more to the point: "The Senator's three houses, various lady friends, assorted con artist pals and piles of unexplained income."

When it comes to sheer brazen corruption, chicanery and dishonesty there is one candidate who stands head and shoulders above everyone else and that is the right-wing Cuban-American and Tea Party darling Senator Marco Rubio of-- naturally-- the great State of Florida.

Mr. Rubio’s entire public image-- the child of poor Cuban immigrants fleeing the repression of Castro’s Cuba who pulled himself up by his bootstraps and even now is a simple José Sixpack and family man-- is less tethered to reality than The Wizard of Oz. For example, in his autobiography, An American Son: A Memoir, Mr. Rubio describes how he allegedly grew up poor and mowed the grass and walked dogs to make a bit of spare change. Technically this may be correct, but most poor kids don’t get paid by relatives heavily involved in narcotics trafficking and whose pets double as guard dogs for a drug cartel, as was the case with young Marco, a federal indictment shows. (See these articles for more on young Marco’s upbringing.)

But it was only after getting into politics that Mr. Rubio really started making big money-- and he made it very quickly, with the help of a few intimate companions-- especially after taking over as Florida House majority leader and whip in early 2003. In fact, his income nearly tripled during the two years-- from $122,000 to $330,000, based on financial disclosure forms-- and spiked again in 2008, which may be tied to the fact that he became Florida House speaker in November 2006.

Mr. Rubio was able to cash in in spectacular fashion because Florida’s preposterously flaccid political rules allow politicians to simultaneously hold public office and work as “consultants” to major law and lobbying firms-- much like the arrangement that recently landed Sheldon Silver in prison in New York. That means that they technically can’t “lobby” but do it anyway and call it “consulting.” So, for example, when Mr. Rubio became House majority leader in 2003 he went to work for the powerhouse lobbying firm of Broad and Cassell, which is precisely the point where disclosure forms reveal a giant spike in his income.

Then, when Mr. Rubio stepped down from the House in 2008 (two years before he ran and won a U.S. Senate seat) he became partner in another law/lobbying firm-- Florida Strategic Consultants-- with the wife of a notoriously corrupt Florida politician and lobbyist named Esteban Bovo, sometimes known as “El Bobo.” (El Bobo’s wife, Vivian Bovo, had been Mr. Rubio’s top aide in the House.) While working at the firm, Mr. Rubio scored fat contracts from Miami Children’s Hospital and Jackson Memorial Hospital. Meanwhile, El Bobo was in position to appropriate money for the hospitals as chairman of a subcommittee of the Florida House Budget Committee. It was a win-win for Mr. Rubio and the Bovo clan.

Meanwhile, Mr. Rubio was making more money on two highly suspicious real estate deals. In the first, Mr. Rubio had a little help from Mark Cereceda, a chiropractor with a lengthy rap sheet. I should note here that after Dr. Cereceda lent a financial hand, Mr. Rubio flipped his position on a key issue of great import to the chiropractor.

Here are the key details: In 2003, Mr. Rubio bought his first house (at 6247 14th Street SW in West Miami) for $175,000, putting zero money down. He put it up for sale in 2005 but had difficulty selling it because of a weak local real estate market. But gracias a Dios, Dr. Cereceda’s mama, Nora Cereceda (now deceased), bought Mr. Rubio’s house in 2007 for $380,000 cash, netting Mr. Rubio a profit of about $205,000. Que suerte!

Shortly after Mr. Rubio sold the house, he did a 180-degree rotation on a key insurance bill for which Dr. Cereceda had been lobbying. Whereas he had previously been an outspoken opponent of the measure-- indeed, he was described in one local press item at the time as “the main holdout”-- he ended up voting for the legislation, which required Florida drivers to purchase $10,000 worth of personal injury Insurance.

Many of Dr. Cereceda’s clients were injured drivers who paid him with insurance money. And by the way, reported cases of personal injury fraud immediately soared in Florida after the measure passed.

Dr. Cereceda has a lengthy arrest record both prior to and after his mama bought Mr. Rubio’s house. In 2003, he was arrested on charges of Aggravated Assault With A Deadly Weapon. Two years later, he was arrested for Felony Battery and also for Disorderly Conduct, and then in 2013 he was busted for running an illegal political contribution scheme by which he ordered his employees to contribute to political campaigns in their names and then he and his relatives reimbursed them. The doctor got off light. He was sentenced to house arrest and given probation.

Dr. Cereceda has been a big donor to Ana Maria Pando, a disgraced former Hialeah branch county court judge, who wrote a letter to state authorities-- on official letterhead-- asking that Dr. Cereceda’s company be reinstated after it got into some legal trouble. Pando was later convicted for taking a bribe from Dr. Cereceda, who ratted her out.

Now let’s turn to Mr. Rubio’s second surprisingly profitable real estate deal. It involves his current Miami-area residence, which he bought in December 2005 for $550,000. He put only 10 percent down on the house, and took out a $495,000 mortgage. Then, just 37 days later, he took out a $135,000 home equity loan (which he initially failed to disclose on his financial disclosure form) on the property.

Mr. Rubio bought the house from a shell company called Sanval Boats LLC and no one knows who controlled that entity and hence who he in fact bought it from. But we do know that Mr. Rubio got very generous terms to finance the house from Miami’s U.S. Century Bank, whose CEO was a former head of the Florida Republican Party named Jim Greer, who later went to jail for money laundering.

A book about Greer called The Chairman: The Rise and Betrayal of Jim Greer has some juicy anecdotes about Mr. Rubio and David Rivera, Mr. Rubio’s one-time best friend and roommate as well as a noted womanizer and former Florida State House member and federal congressman. (A number of other top officials at the U.S. Century Bank were major political supporters of Mr. Rubio’s.)

A passage from the book reads:

“There was an indication that Rubio had an affair,” said Greer. A woman who had worked in his legislative office when he was Speaker of the House abruptly left and got a job at Florida International University as a part-time professor. Emails she had sent him through her college account had become public record. Our opposition research specialist said the emails included things like, “I have to talk to you right now. I can’t take this anymore. Why aren’t you returning my calls?” To an oppositional researcher the Crist campaign had hired, it appeared there had been a close relationship between the two and that Rubio had broken it off.”

In any event, Mr. Rubio’s $135,000 home equity loan was granted only because U.S. Century Bank mysteriously reappraised its worth upwards by about one-third, to $735,000, little more than a month after he purchased the property. “It looks a lot like somebody’s currying favor with an important political person,” one real estate analyst said of Mr. Rubio’s real estate dealings in a 2008 story that ran in a Miami newspaper. “People off the street don’t get this deal.”

It’s worth pointing out here that Miami-Dade County assessors put the market value of the house at $503,000 in 2006, some 50 percent less than US Century Bank’s appraisal at the same time. The house’s assessed value topped out the following year at $540,401 and last year county assessors estimated its worth at a mere $400,492, an increase from $391,443 in 2013.

David Rivera’s former girlfriend, Ana Alliegro, is currently under house arrest for her role in a complicated campaign finance/bribery scheme allegedly masterminded by Mr. Rivera, who helped her flee to Nicaragua before she was apprehended and turned over to U.S. authorities. Mr. Rivera is under investigation in the scheme, but the case has been stalled for months, infuriating Ms. Alliegro, who has publicly denounced Mr. Rivera and said she wants him to go to prison. I’m told by a few well-placed sources that Ms. Alliegro knows everything about Mr. Rubio, including the names of a number of his lady friends-- more coming on that-- but I was unable to reach her.

Mr. Rubio and David Rivera met in 1992, when both worked for the campaign of Florida Congressman Lincoln Díaz-Balart, and have been bosom buddies ever since. According to a Politico story, Mr. Rivera advised and stumped for Mr. Rubio in his first campaign for the state House in 2000. Mr. Rubio repaid the favor and helped Mr. Rivera win a House seat two years later. In 2006, Mr. Rivera played a key role in getting Mr. Rubio selected as the first Cuban-American speaker of the Florida House.

Anyway, Mr. Rivera is just a generally shady guy. (In 2012, Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington named him one of the most corrupt members of the House.) He was investigated by Florida law enforcement authorities in 2004 over a $1 million contract he received to promote a ballot initiative pushed by a Florida gambling magnate named Alex Havenick. Mr. Havenick’s family has long thrived in Florida’s notoriously crooked dog track betting industry, whose roots trace back to Meyer Lanksy, Al Capone’s CFO. Mr. Rivera was not charged in the case.

There’s a lot more about all of this below and I should probably get on to the topic of Mr. Rubio’s lady friends, but first (and relatedly) I need to discuss a third house that Mr. Rubio owned, or co-owned anyway, with Mr. Rivera, the former House member and skirt chaser. This house is located in Tallahassee, the state capitol, where a lot of lobbyists work, including a few who are close friends of Mr. Rubio’s.

There is, for example, Bridget Nocco of Smith & Ballard (now known as Ballard Partners), a former top staffer in the Florida House who raised oodles of cash for Mr. Rubio when he served in the state congress and who is now “known nationally as a top-tier Republican fundraiser,” and who over the years has traveled with Mr. Rubio and gotten paid quite well from several of his dubious political action committees. (She did not return a phone call seeking comment.)

Mr. Rubio is also extraordinarily close to another lobbyist, but this one-- Dana Hudson-- is a vegetarian, according to her Twitter feed, lives in the Washington, D.C., area, and advocates on behalf of Homeland Security. Note here that Mr. Rubio does not serve on the Senate Homeland Security Committee, but the subject is dear to him, as one can immediately discern from his official website. Based on her tweets, the perky blonde Ms. Hudson is mad for Mr. Rubio, who she talks about obsessively, and is clearly a passionate supporter of his presidential campaign. For example, on January 6, when campaign consultant and “Jesus-follower” Gary Marx signed on with Mr. Rubio, Ms. Hudson tweeted, “@Garymarx very excited u joined #TeamMarco! Let’s do this! and elect @marcorubio #POTUS.” (Ms. Hudson did not return a message left at her office, nor did she reply to messages left via Twitter and Facebook. I should also note here that Ms. Alliegro, the former girlfriend of David Rivera, has suggested that Ms. Hudson traveled with her former boyfriend and knew him well.)

Anyway, let’s return now to the house in Tallahassee-- at 1484 Bent Willow Drive in an area called Timber Lakes-- that Mr. Rubio and Mr. Rivera co-owned and that Politico dubbed their “house of horrors.” When they bought it in 2005 for $135,000, they were repeatedly behind on the mortgage payments, it was almost foreclosed on at various points and they sold it last year for less than they paid for it. Also, I’m not sure exactly who officially hosted or attended but there were reportedly wild parties thrown at the house. The house sold in July for just $117,000.

Public records show that a woman named Tamara Hardy moved into the house in 2010 and lived there during the time Mr. Rubio and Mr. Rivera were trying to sell it. I have heard conflicting accounts about whether Ms. Hardy paid rent at the house or lived there because she was a friend of either Mr. Rubio or Mr. Rivera. I tried to reach Ms. Hardy for comment but was unsuccessful.

(I should also note that I sought comment from Mr. Rubio’s Senate office for this story and it directed me to his presidential campaign office. It failed to reply to a long list of questions for this story.)

I mentioned above a PAC and a bribe so let me turn to that story now, which actually involved a few of Mr. Rubio’s PACs and assorted businesses. Pay particular attention here to three key figures who were all intimate, longtime friends of Mr. Rubio’s:

• Alexander Heckler, an attorney who in 2011 was found to have set up PACs that shuffled illegal straw donations to political candidates for his clients. Heckler, a lawyer and leading Florida lobbyist as well as a “Hillraiser,” the term for then-Senator Hillary Clinton’s top fundraisers, performed legal and accounting services for the treasurer of a Rubio-affiliated PAC, but only disclosed that several years afterwards, apparently to obscure his role. Heckler is also the stepson of Franklin Sands, who for many years-- including the period when the story below took place-- was the most powerful Democrat in the Florida House.

• Joaquin Urquiola, the treasurer for the two Rubio-affiliated PACs who Heckler did work for, who at the same time was being questioned by federal regulators about his role at an Ecuadorian bank with Miami offices that was suspected of violating anti-money laundering laws by taking in cash from several South American drug cartels. Urquiola was an accountant and director of the bank, Pacific National Bank, and he and Pacific were in fact subsequently hit with fines for violating anti-money laundering laws and the Bank Secrecy Act. According to a 2011 story about the case in the South Florida Business Journal, the bank and its directors had previously been sanctioned for similar crimes and allowed “the violations to continue for years.”

• Bridget Nocco, the lobbyist friend of Mr. Rubio’s whom I mentioned above.

The story begins in late 2002 when Jeanette Dousdebes, Mr. Rubio’s wife, incorporated a nonprofit PAC called Floridians for Conservative Leadership Committee (FCLC). She was the registered agent and only director for this short-lived entity, which the State of Florida dissolved three years later because it had failed to file an annual report. Urquiola, the executive at the bank that allowed a drug cartel to launder money, was the group’s treasurer, and Heckler quietly helped him out, according to information provided to me by the National Legal and Policy Center, a Virginia-based watchdog group that provided key research for this section of the story.

During its brief existence, FCLC raised $228,350, of which roughly $35,000 disappeared into thin air, according to the entity’s own tax returns. Its largest donor by far was a scandal-plagued PAC called OPH ($50,000) but Democratic super-lobbyist Ron Book also gave generously. Bridget Nocco, Mr. Rubio’s lobbyist pal, was paid nearly $26,000 by the PAC for salary and consulting services, according to its nonprofit tax filings with the IRS.

Shortly before its demise FCLC made two payments to a super PAC (which are known as 527s, based on the IRS rule that allows them) with a similar name, Floridians for Conservative Leadership in Government (FCLG). The latter was formed in 2004 with Marco Rubio as its president and registered agent, his wife as the VP and Urquiola as its treasurer.

In any event, the State of Florida dissolved Mr. Rubio’s 527 in 2006 because-- you guessed it-- it failed to file an annual report.

Many of the companies and individuals that donated to the two groups had major business interests before the Florida Legislature and the two entities had overlapping donors, such as super-lobbyist Mr. Book, and payees, such as Bridget Nocco, who netted $90,062 from the 527 for salary and consulting services.

Another notable recipient of cash from Mr. Rubio’s 527 was a company called Servicarga, which in 2004 received $3,500, which it billed for “courier services.” What’s curious here is that Mr. Rubio’s wife owned Servicarga and that, according to IRS returns and other documents, the company stopped operating in 1997.



Mr. Rubio, Urquiola and Heckler were all players in another shady deal, this one involving a nonprofit PAC called Floridians for Real Family Values Inc. It was set up by Heckler in 2006-- the year Mr. Rubio was sworn in as speaker of the Florida House.

For some reason Heckler failed to disclose to Florida election authorities that Urquiola was the PAC’s treasurer, but he was listed as filling that role in the group’s federal tax returns, which Heckler filed. What’s also odd is that the federal tax identification number Urquiola used for Floridians for Real Family Values’ tax return was actually the same used by the FCLG, the 527 that Mr. Rubio created and was president of, which suggests that the two entities were essentially identical.

Between October 24 and November 2 of 2006, Floridians for Real Family Values raised $244,000. Also in 2006, Urquiola incorporated a company called Florida Media Productions Group Inc., which operated out of the same address as the FCLG.

Florida Media Productions Group was established to work on behalf of political campaigns, but there’s not much evidence that the company did any work at all. It never bothered to set up a website nor did it ever create a single TV, print or online campaign ad. The only income it ever received-- about $150,000-- came from two Heckler’s controlled PACs, one being Floridians for Real Family Values.

All that money was paid for “consulting” services, though the payments were made long after the election year was over. Most of the money raised by Floridians for Real Family Values that didn’t go to Florida Media Productions Group-- about $33,000-- simply disappeared when the former was shut down.

Mr.Rubio would appear to be a terrible money manager. He’s made a ton of cash in politics (and spent piles of political money on what appear to be personal items, such as a family reunion he later claimed was charged to his campaign by mistake), as a “consultant,” and on two real estate deals, but records show he has serious cash flow problems.

All of this raises a lot of questions-- to take an obvious one: Where does all of his money go? Whatever the answers, one thing is clear. Marco Rubio has some very, very curious and disturbing political bedfellows.

Something tells me sweaty little Rubio is going to be too scared of the megaphone Herr Trumpf commands to attack him personally, at least not in strong enough terms to satisfy the Kochs, who detest Trumpf and who are threatening to make Cruz their candidate if the boy with the high heeled booties doesn't do his part in bringing down Trumpf.

A War On Christianity Led By President Obama? It’s Republican World, 2015 In Review-- Chapter Ten

Did Rupert Murdoch immigrate to America so he could destroy it from within?

-by Noah

Even before he was elected in 2008, Republicans began creating an alternate universe in which Barack Obama was a Muslim, born in Kenya. Once elected, the Republican nihilism machine worked itself into an out of control frenzy of birtherism, led by the usual hate radio suspects, demented celebrity birthers such as Pam Geller and Donald Trump, and, of course, the birther TV channel itself, FOX “News”, which for quite a while, seemingly went “all birther, all the time” in its ongoing massive effort to delegitimize the presidency of President Obama.

Now, in 2015, after so much brainwashing, we have a Republican Party whose majority believes to their core that President Obama is a Muslim born outside of the United States and a republican party whose leading candidate for the party’s nomination is the lead birther himself, Donald Trump. What’s that saying about repeat a lie often enough and it becomes accepted fact? That’s Republican World for you.

Think for a minute on that one. This is a classic example of the sickness of the Republican mind. I mean, don’t you think for a second that if Barack Obama was not born in the United States, that the Clintons would have found proof of it and used it like a bludgeon in the 2008 primary, thus preventing Sen. Obama from ever even becoming the nominee?

Oh, I suppose that if you live in Republican World, you either can’t get your mind around that one, or, the Clintons are all part of the same great Obama/Muslim/Marxist conspiracy. After all, if Hillary Clinton shot Vince Foster and also deliberately allowed the deaths in Benghazi, she’s capable of anything, isn’t she?

In Republican World 2015, it’s become not enough to believe just that President Obama is a Muslim born in Kenya or on Mars or wherever. No, this has now grown like a mind cancer into a belief that President Obama, because he is a Muslim, is naturally leading “the left” in a war on Christianity.

Forget for a second that this common statement from prominent Republicans about President Obama and “the left” leading this war on Christianity assumes that if one is a “liberal” one could not possibly be a Christian. That is insane, but consider the source. Republicans are in a mini-rapture from playing their victim cards about the whole matter. Paranoia strikes deep with these people. To them, their imaginary “war on Christianity” is as real as the imaginary evil, non-citizen Muslim/Marxist Obama. Once you believe in the latter, belief in the former is easy, not to mention addicting.

To Republicans living in Republican World, not building border walls, bringing in refugees, marriage equality (especially that one), planned parenthood (both the planning part and the clinics named so), not saying “Islamic Terrorist”, Voting Rights, and even saying “Happy Holidays” are all part of the dastardly plan.

Here are just a few of the victim card playing loons, noted Republican voices all, weighing in on the subject with what’s left of the brains they might have been born with:

• “We are moving rapidly toward the criminalization of Christianity.”
-Mike Huckabee (on an April Family Research Council conference call of conservative pastors)

• “There’s no room for Christians in today’s Democratic Party.”
-Ted Cruz (at this year’s Iowa Faith & Freedom Summit)

•“There is a liberal fascism that is dedicated to going after believing Christians who follow the biblical teaching on marriage.”
-Ted Cruz (at the very same Iowa Faith & Freedom Summit)

•“If you’re a Christian or a white man in the USA, it’s open season on you.”
-Bill O’Reilly (O’Reilly Factor 4/13/15)

•“If you think about it, we are at the water’s edge of the argument that mainstream Christian teaching is hate speech.”
-Marco Rubio (CBN interview. 5/26/15)

If you listen to these crazies long enough, you’ll half expect them to say that Dylann Roof was acting as some sort of agent for Barack Obama when he went and shot those parishioners in Charleston, South Carolina. And, don’t forget, there have been a lot of church burnings lately. Hmmmm. Must be that Muslim guy.

The above quotes almost seem mild compared to the dark thoughts that Rick Santorum offered at a Town Hall in Plano, Texas back in February, 2009.

They are taking faith and crushing it. Why? Why? When you marginalize faith in America, when you remove the pillar of God-given rights, then what’s left is the French Revolution. What’s left is the government that gives you right, what’s left are no unalienable rights, what’s left is a government that will tell you who you are, and what you’ll do and when you’ll do it. What’s left in France became the guillotine. Ladies and gentlemen, we’re a long way from that, but if we do and follow the path of President Obama and his overt hostility to faith in America, then we are headed down that road.

In the real world, the first in line sent to the guillotine in the French Revolution were not the victims of the government oppression but those who were the oppressors. In the throes of anti-Obama mania, Santorum seems to have misunderstood the French Revolution. But, I’ll admit that I’m not sure exactly what he’s trying to say here. Maybe subtitles are needed when the man speaks. In any event, I really don’t think we are headed toward beheadings at the hands of President Obama, but, isn’t it fascinating that in the minds of Republicans, President Obama, being as he is, of course, a Muslim, will, one day, start beheading Americans. That’s quite an image and it’s the classic propagandistic fear-mongering that we get from Republican World.

A Star Is Born: Christopher Hucko -- Republican Candidate #18?

Photo by the Orland Park (IL) Police Dept.

"Man arrested for vibrator theft offers to show police his penis, before slamming Obama"

-- a New York Daily News headline yesterday

by Noah

I bet the above headline from the New York Daily News caught your eye. What the hell? you probably said. What's next? And I bet you want to read more, right? Here is Laurie Hanna's lead, possibly the dream lead of a newspaperperson's career:

A Chicago man caught with a stolen vibrator in his underwear told cops he had no idea how the device got there, before stripping naked in his cell and shouting derogatory comments about President Obama.

Now you're probably thinking, where do they get these people? In fact, to get a real feel for what a character this guy is, you need to read either the Daily News piece or The Smoking Gun's.

My reaction, though, went a little further. Given the lunacy of the current republican primary season, this man just may be what republican voters are looking for! Forget Trumpy. Trumpy is so yesterday. There's a new loon in town!

It's not just the mere existence or even thought of President Obama that drives republicans over the edge. I've commented before about the fact that there is also something weird about the way the republican mind deals with human sexuality. Both topics drive them batty. And for the 2016 election cycle we have no shortage of republican presidential candidates that epitomize this dual absurdity.

So here I am, proposing one more potential republican candidate for the 2016 presidential nomination. We already have 17 crazies; why not add one more to the mix? Meet candidate #18: Christopher Hucko. Might he end up being the bottom on a Trump-Hucko ticket? Surely this man, like Trumpy, knows how to get our attention.

Far be it from me to be judgmental. Understand that when I talk about republican attitudes toward all things to do with sex and sexuality, I don't mean "weird" in any kinky sense or anything like that -- although there is the whole "Masturbation is murder" crew, and then there's presidential candidate Rick Santorum who's on record as saying that contraception leads to things that are "not okay." (Hint: like pleasure, when we know that sex is only for procreation.)

And you better not be enjoying it!

We've also been hearing a lot lately about republican efforts to defund Planned Parenthood, about their general war on women, including 2012 VP candidate Paul Ryan's hateful attempts to redefine rape, and about their demented homophobia. Current republican presidential candidates Rand Paul and Mike Huckabee have even agreed to appear in an anti-gay "documentary."

Ben Carson? Well, try not to engage him in a conversation about sex in prison. "A lot of people who go into prison," he has said, "go into prison straight and when they come out, they’re gay." This in fact is one of Right Wing Watch's "Five Wildest Ben Carson Quotes: Prison Sex, Nazi America, Health Care Slavery And More." Possibly after you look at the other four quotes, you may want to just avoid any conversation with Ben Carson altogether.

Then there's current leading republican candidate Donald Trump's recent post-debate attacks on Megyn Kelly of FOX "News," saying she had "blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her wherever." Let's let John Oliver deconstruct this one.



Sure, there's no doubt that Megyn was out to get Trumpy for his previous misogynistic comments, but for republicans such sexism is standard fare, and judging from Trumpy's growing poll numbers, it's obviously a plus to republican voters. Besides, Megyn Kelly is not one who should pretend to be classy in such matters, when she herself went on the notoriously misogynistic Howard Stern show and talked about her breasts and her husband's penis.

It's also hard to forget the not-so-long-ago spectacle of a republican-led House of Representatives getting so worked up in a lather over President Clinton getting a BJ from an intern that they released every graphic detail in book form to the media and the public, thinking that that would convince the American public to go along with their impeachment efforts.


LET'S FACE IT, REPUGS VIEW MATTERS OF SEX AND
SEXUALITY DIFFERENTLY FROM NORMAL PEOPLE

With all of this in mind, I give you Christopher Hucko. What, you may ask, are his presidential credentials? Hey, c'mon, what are any of their credentials? I mean, Rick Perry? Scott Walker? Another Bush?

Euphoria G-Spot Delight (in pink)

Well, in addition to the possibility that his surname is a shortened version of Huckabee, Mr. Hucko has been known to sign his name as "Obama is a criminal," as he did when he was asked to sign a Miranda consent form by the officers who collared him with the $48 pink Euphoria G-Spot Delight vibrator that had mysteriously found its way into his underwear. That signature alone will get him tons of republican votes, but Hucko features the perfect storm of being able to rant mindlessly about President Obama and do it while offering to show police his penis (that had been his answer to the question of what he had stuffed in his pants), which he claims has a tattoo of a cherry on it. In short, he's perfect!  Reince Priebus can rest easy now. He's found his man!

Let's ignore the fact that Hucko was arrested after shoplifting the vibrator from a Chicago sex emporium and said he didn't know how it got into his pants. There are plenty of cases of criminal activity not being an impediment to a political career. If bribery is legal, why should being caught stealing a vibrator and stuffing it in your pants end your dream? Which does more harm to society? (And if you think of the delegates who will choose the GOP presidential candidate in Cleveland, how many of them would love to have a pink Euphoria G-Spot Delight stuffed in their underwear? Probably a lot of the women too.)


WILL HUCKO BE ONSTAGE FOR THE NEXT REPUBLICAN DEBATE?

That's not for me to say. But I do know that he would fit right in. In addition, can't you just see him on Hannity, sitting between Pat Robertson and the Duck Dynasty wacko? Hucko is a natural! Can't you see him talking loofahs with Bill-O? (He has a police record, but I can't say for sure that it includes stealing a loofah.)

The quest for the 2016 Republican presidential nomination is already the expected freakshow. But Christopher Hucko could be the cherry to go with the nuts on the sundae. (Don't forget that tattoo of a cherry he says he has on his penis.) We're already seeing some candidates trying to out-Trump Trumpy, but this guy Hucko -- well, the possibilities are endless. What would Trumpy or any of the other 17-and-counting loonies be able to do to top him? Create a line of self-named sex toys to hand out at rallies in Iowa? Will they all appear at the next debate with vibrators standing on their podiums, as if to say, "Hey, Megyn, say hello to my little friend," while the republican audience cheers? I think we've blown right past "binders full of women."

Not to worry about the losers in this primary. They can always become pitchers for Viagra like failed republican presidential candidate Bob Dole did all the way back in 1998.

The only real question is, what do any of these wackjobs do if he ends up getting his party's nomination and has to face Hillary Clinton, assuming she wins hers? What with all of them obviously suffering feelings of inadequacy, all she would have to do is go to the first debate, pull out a vibrator and wave it at her opponent, laughing as she screams, "Mine's bigger!" Game over.

#

Has Ricky-Roo Santorum yet thought of any possible "rationale" for the Charleston AME church shoot-up besides hostility to religion?

“You just can’t think that things like this can happen in America. It’s obviously a crime of hate. Again, we don’t know the rationale, but what other rationale could there be? You’re sort of lost that somebody could walk into a Bible study in a church and indiscriminately kill people,” Santorum told radio host Joe Piscopo Thursday on AM 970, a New York radio station. “It’s something that, again, you think we’re beyond that in America and it’s sad to see.”

The former Pennsylvania senator pointed to what he described as anti-religious sentiment.

“All you can do is pray for those and pray for our country,” Santorum said. “This is one of those situations where you just have to take a step back and say we — you know, you talk about the importance of prayer in this time and we’re now seeing assaults on our religious liberty we’ve never seen before. It’s a time for deeper reflection beyond this horrible situation.”

-- from a "Post Politics" post yesterday by Jose A. DelReal

by Ken

In The New Yorker, Jelani Cobb wrote yesterday ("Death in Charleston"):

We have, quite likely, found at 110 Calhoun Street, in Charleston, South Carolina, the place where Columbine, Aurora, and Newtown cross with Baltimore, Ferguson, and Sanford. We periodically mourn the deaths of a group of Americans who die at the hands of another armed American. We periodically witness racial injustices that inspire anger in the streets. And sometimes we witness both. This is, quite simply, how we now live.

Not, however, our our Ricky-Roo lives. "What other rationale could there be?" he wanted to know. True, he claimed to be talking about "a hate crime," and I think we can agree that it would be hard to deny the suitability of that designation. But the only hate the Ricky-Roo-ster seemed able to imagine was hatred of religion. And at this point surely we have to ask, "Could you really think of no other 'rationale' for the shooting-up of a Charleston AME church? Think hard now, Ricky-Roo."

Alas, Ricky-Roo doesn't think, so I guess "thinking hard" is out of the question. But apparently no, he couldn't imagine any other reason why a young white man might come into a black church and shoot the place up.

Which is why it would help him if he ever learned to keep his imbecilic yap shut.

I should clarify what I mean by "insane," because I expect that mental-health professionals would find many strange features to Ricky-Roo's mental processes but none that fit any of our definitions of insanity. No, although Ricky-Roo's behavior and speech are indistinguishable from clinical insanity, he isn't insane in the sense of a deficiency in mental capacity. He's one of those people who, perhaps inspired by his notion of "God," made the decision always to check his brain at the door. Right-wingers don't believe in checking their guns at the door, feeling a compulsive need to "carry" at all times, but their brains they never carry.

Which leaves the Roo-ster with no mental capacity for understanding that:

(1) Far from in any sanely imaginable way impinging on religious liberty, the U.S. displays an almost insane degree of tolerance for almost anyu wacko bullshit fobbed off in the name of religion

(2) What now passes for religious belief in the U.S. has crossed more widely and deeply across the line of sanity and decency -- as witness the ravings of a degraded beast like Ricky-Roo. Not only is he allowed to spew the poisonous ignorance that fills the space occupied by his brain, but he is actually listened to, and covered by TV and print media as if he had a working brain.

(3) If there is nevertheless a growing unease about religious tolerance in the U.S., the obvious first place to look is at the sociopaths and psychopaths who have so ruthlessly pushed the boundarires to see just how much insane behavior they can get away. In other words, Ricky-Roo, before you go wagging your necrotic finger of doom at others, take a good long look in the mirror.

Now, Ricky-Roo, if you had thought to raise the possibility -- in that fairly brief period before we knew anything about the shooter -- that he might have been racially motivated, you wouldn't be looking as much like an ideological psychopath, or just plain jackass. But of course you wouldn't have thought to raise that possibility, because you're a prisoner of your mental incapacity. And of course you wouldn't have thought about the whole issue of American gun violence. This is what it's like to live in as bizarre and unreal a space as your mind.

Saddest of all, it would never occur to you just to keep your fool mouth shut. That's all part of who you are.


OF COURSE THE NRA IS TARGETING THE SLAIN PASTOR

Because that's who they are.

NRA official blames slain South Carolina pastor for Charleston church shooting because he opposed concealed firearms

BY DAN FRIEDMAN, CORKY SIEMASZKO
Friday, June 19, 2015, 12:09 PM

NRA board member Charles Cotton

One of the NRA’s top numbskulls responded to the Charleston church massacre by shooting off his mouth — and blaming the victims.

Displaying all the sensitivity of an anvil, Charles Cotton said the slaughter was the fault of Clementa Pinckney, the murdered pastor of the Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church who also was a South Carolina state senator.

“Eight of his church members who might be alive if he had expressly allowed members to carry handguns in church are dead,” Cotton declared. “Innocent people died because of his position on a political issue."

Cotton, who sits on the board of the National Rifle Association, wrote on an online forum for Texas gun advocates that Pinckney had “voted against concealed-carry.”

Nowhere did Cotton mention Dylann Roof, the white racist who used his 21st birthday money to buy the gun that police said he used to slaughter Pinckney and the others in the church basement Wednesday.

MEANWHILE IN CHARLESTON --

Officials: Suspect in church slayings unrepentant amid outcry over racial hatred


A 21-year-old white man accused of murdering nine people in a historic black South Carolina church makes his first court appearance.

By Jeremy Borden, Sari Horwitz and Jerry Markon
June 19 at 3:06 PM

CHARLESTON, S.C. — The gunman charged with killing nine people in an African American church was unrepentant during a confession to police, even after almost backing out of what he called his “mission” because church members were so nice to him, according to law enforcement officials and others briefed on the investigation.

Dylann Roof not only confessed to causing the Wednesday night carnage in Charleston, but said he wanted his actions known, said the law enforcement officials, who spoke on condition of anonymity because the investigation is unfolding. They said Roof espoused strong anti-black views when questioned by officers.

But the 21-year-old also told police he had briefly reconsidered his plan during the time he spent quietly watching a Bible study group before opening fire, two people briefed on the investigation said. Roof “said he “almost didn’t go through with it because they were so nice to him” one of the people said, before concluding: “I had to complete my mission.”

As he methodically fired and reloaded several times, the person said, Roof called out: “You all are taking over our country. Y’all want something to pray about? I’ll give you something to pray about.”

Roof’s words added to an emerging portrait that suggests the 21-year-old was driven by runaway racial hatred in the attacks — unleashed after Roof spent nearly an hour watching the group before opening fire, authorities said. . . .

#

Crackpot Utopia: The Year in Republican Crazy, Part 7

• And so it begins: The running of the buffoons
• Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 7: George Will has no idea what rape is
• Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 8: Rick Wiles calls for a coup

2016 GOP Buffoon No. 1 steps forward: He-e-ere's Booby!

Crackpot Utopia: A dream world as envisioned by republicans; a manifestation or expression of the deranged, warped alternate universe inhabited by republicans, at least in their minds. See also: Bachmannism, Boehneresque.

by Noah

1. And so it begins: The running of the buffoons

The media will call it the Extended Republican Primary Season, the period where all sorts of weirdos and wackos come out of the woodwork of American society and begin vying for the republican nomination for president. This is the freak show that leads up to the November 2016 election.

Already, at the end of 2014, one buffoon is stepping forward! It's Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal, and, he's even starting out his campaign just like Texas Gov. Rick Perry did in 2012. Praise God, hallelujah! No, really.

Like Perry in 2012, Jindal is beginning his quest for the White House by headlining the notoriously extremist American Family Association Christ-o-nut hate-fest event called "The Response." If you want to go, the next one will be held at Louisiana State University in January. The AFA has put out a prayer guide for the event that happens to be the same as the one from four years ago when Rick Perry was the headliner. Among other things, the prayer guide blames Hurricane Katrina on abortion and the fact that "Homosexuality has been embraced as an alternative lifestyle." Also to blame are such things as same-sex marriage and Internet porn.

It gets better. When reporters from the New Orleans Times-Picayune questioned the, for lack of a better word, sanity of the American Family Association's prayer guide for the Jindal-headlined event, the AFA removed the prayer guide from their website, then -- wait for it -- put up a new guide that blames 9/11 on homosexuality!

Bobby Jindal is no fringe republican. His state has elected him twice. The national republican party chose him to give its response to President Obama's first State of the Union speech in 2009. To republicans, his extremism is mainstream and normal. Do not make the mistake of thinking that there is such a thing as a sane republican. Those went extinct decades ago.

The problem for these psychos is that they'd rather it be 1692, or any time when witches could still be burned in the public square. The more "liberal" among them might not long to go back quite so far in time. They might want to just settle for pre-1967 England, when the local police could arrest you for so much as looking a bit gay, or the glorious days of the early-20th-century United States, when women could not vote. Some would settle for 1950s pre-Little Rock America. Pleasantville.



So, who will it be this coming primary season? Will we see Rick Santorum doing his Mr. Rogers imitation again? Will he be spouting off about leading an anti-contraception movement one more time? Santorum is not to be taken likely. It's safe to say that had he had any kind of organization geared towards winning the 2012 nomination, he, not the contemptuous Mittens Romney, would have been the candidate proudly put forth by the Crackpot Party. But Santorum couldn't even get it together enough to get his name on the Washington State primary ballot.

Mittens? His titanic overblown ego says yes. His "It's our turn" wife probably still dreams of walking around the White House in a tiara and gown. Many of the cash rustlers like him, But until he can learn to hide his contempt for the un-rich and un-white, along with the rest of the psychopathic characteristics of his makeup, any candidacy of his is doomed to simply not get enough votes from anybody other than a fellow republicans. Besides, all that allegedly laundered Sheldon Adelson casino gangster cash from Las Vegas and from Macao couldn't buy him the White House last time.

Rudy Giuliani? He once spent $50 million to get one delegate, and that delegate was from Florida! Florida -- not surprising. Plus, Rudy is deteriorating mentally at a rapid rate, as evidenced by his recent man-crush on Russian leader Vladimer Putin, who he says is his idea of a great leader  -- much better than President Obama. Then there's Rudy's recent attempts at fanning the flames of racial division and making political hay over the tragic killings of two New York police officers.

Jeb Bush? Another scion of America's biggest crime family? The man who directed the purging of minority voters from the voter registration rolls in his state? He's being cutesy about it, but he's already running. Yeah, brother Neil Bush can find enough cash, laundered and otherwise, and god knows what Karl Rove would get up to, but after Dubya and their dad, if America "elects" another Bush, then America truly does have a death wish. Do we really want to see another era of phony wars, an uptick of terror, a blown economy, and the newest drugs all over our streets?

Allen West? This shining light of the Republican Party says he knows for a fact that up to 81 Democratic members of Congress are members of the Communist Party.



President West? Well, wouldn't that be entertaining! He's even more certifiable than your average republican politician or voter.

Maybe one of the neo-fascist governors of the Midwest like Scott Walker (WI) or Rick Snyder (MI) or John Kasich (OH)? They're all managing to turn their respective states into hellholes of republican governance. Michele Bachmann? Well, she's not doing much now that she's left Washington. Where does Chris Christie fit in? Herman Cain? Paul "Crazy Eyes" Ryan, who worships at the altar of Ayn Rand and calls rape just another "method of conception"? Now who's satanic?

Media types can't go an hour without mentioning Rafael "Ted" Cruz or Rand "Lester Maddox" Paul. Even Sarah Palin has not ruled herself out. So many folks suffer greatly from delusions of grandeur these days!

Texas moron (yeah, I know that description is the definition of redundant) Rick "Ooops" Perry
now wears glasses, thinking it makes him look more intellectual. Is the republican base dumb enough to fall for that one? Rhetorical question.


It's as easy as one-two-three! Remember, though, that almost-ex-Governor Rick is wearing glasses now, so he could probably make it all the way to three.

Of course, there just may be some other great white misogynist or Grand Wizard wannabe lurking in the weeds. Louie "The Bestiality Guy" Gohmert? Lindsey "We're Running Out of Angry White Guys" Graham? Somebody we haven't even heard of, yet? Maybe Newtie thinks his time has finally come! Oh, joy!

One wonders if the republicans put crazies like West, Bachmann, and Jindal on their stages just to make your average everyday nutter like Rudy Giuliani look relatively sane by comparison. It may be their way of pushing the envelope in what is "acceptable." With that in mind, for the next installment of "Crackpot Utopia," 'm going to offer up some possible republican presidential tickets that would make sense to the majority of those who call themselves republicans. My suggestions are no stranger than what we have seen and what we will continue to see from the republican party as the 2016 race approaches. Keep in mind that every four years republicans get even crazier than before. It is their way.


2. Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 7:
George Will has no idea what rape is

Colleges and universities are being educated by Washington and are finding the experience excruciating. They are learning that when they say campus victimizations are ubiquitous (‘micro-agressions,' often not discernible to the untutored eye, are everywhere), and that when they make victimhood a coveted status that confers privileges, victims proliferate. [Emphasis added.]

OK, Will's verbal excretions are not as buzzwordy as Todd Aiken's "if it's a legitimate rape" or Paul Ryan's "method of conception" comments, but women coveting rape status? One wonders about the women such cretins marry.


3. Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 8: 
Rick Wiles calls for a coup

Wiles is a righty radio host who travels the same American Family Association road I opened up this post with. Among other things, he says that rights for homosexuals have prompted North Korea to threaten nuclear war, and that Columbine and Sandy Hook were perpetrated by government "mind-control assassins." Here's the great mind of Wiles calling for a coup:

I warned in 2008 that Barack Obama's mission is to instigate a second Civil War in America. His regime is deliberately ripping the country apart and if the US Military doesn't take action soon to arrest Barack Obama and remove him and his regime from the White House, there will be no country left for the military to defend. We are on the edge of collapse as a nation. Jesus Christ is America's only hope. Let us pray that Almighty God delivers us from this very real tyranny that seeks to persecute the saints of God.

Man, the Crackpot Utopians sure like to play the victim card and the God card. This assclown has managed to combine the two, along with some really neat paranoia into one little package of republican crazyspeak. Brilliant! May God have mercy on their tortured souls. I wouldn't.


TOMORROW IN PART 8: Things to come: Forward into the Past! (11 Presidential Dream Tickets); Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 9, former republican VP nominee Paul Ryan; and Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 10, Bryan Fischer of the American Family Association

NOAH'S 2014 IN REVIEW --
Crackpot Utopia: The Year in Republican Crazy

Part 1: Princess Liz Cheney tries for the Smoothie of the Year Award; "Miss Beck regrets" -- Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 1: Glenn Beck; and the Crackpot Party reacts to President Obama’s State of the Union speech [12/19/2014]
Part 2: Republicans wonder why normal people call them racists; Sean Hannity wants to self-deport; and the First Annual Mr. Burns Award, to ABC "shark" Kevin O'Leary [12/20/2014]
Part 3: Using fear, loathing, and paranoia to sell stuff; Arizona legalizes crack!; and Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 3: Bill O’Reilly [12/21/2014]
Part 4: A celebration of Michele Bachmann: Pray away the crazy?; What "War on Women"?; and the "Obama angle" on Malaysian Flight 370 [12/22/2014]
Part 5: The GOP and the kiss heard 'round the world; Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 5: Joe the Plumber [12/23/2014]
Part 6: A word about South Carolina; Pat Robertson and his magic asteroid; and I'll have a pack of Twizzlers and an IUD to go, please [12/24/2014]
Part 7: And so it begins: The running of the buffoons; Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 7, George Will has no idea what rape is; and Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 8, Rick Wiles calls for a coup [12/29/2014]
Part 8: Things to come: Forward into the past! (11 Presidential Dream Tickets); Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 9: Former republican VP nominee Paul "Crazy Eyes" Ryan; Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 10: Bryan Fischer of the American Family Association [12/30/2014]
Part 9: Pompous Blowhard of the Year Award: Bill O’Reilly; FOX "News" announces new spinoff: the "FOX Benghazi™" Shopping Channel!; Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 11: DiGiorno Pizza [12/31/2014]
Part 10: Newsmax -- Beyond Drudgery; and Crazyspeak of the Year nominees Nos. 12 and 13: Michele Bachmann, Kimberly Guilfoyle [1/1/2015]
Part 11: GOP and FOX whip up the hate over a POW exchange; and Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 14: Iowa asylum escapee Rep. Steve King [1/3/2015]
Part 12: Arizona Republican protests busload of YMCA campers; Crazyspeak of the Year nominee(s) No. 15: the Impeachment Variations (group nomination); Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 16: NM Rep. Steve Pearce [1/4/2015]
Part 13 (and last): TV for Dummies: Sarah Palin launches her own channel; Crazyspeak of the Year nominee No. 17: Arizona schools superintendent John Huppenthal (rhymes with Neanderthal); and the final Crazyspeak of the Year nominee -- and also the winner! [1/5/2015]

NOAH'S 2013 IN REVIEW --
A Prayer to the Janitor of Lunacy

For listings and links, see Part 1 of this year's series.

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