Midnight Meme Of The Day!

by Noah

Moscow Mitch. Joe Scarborough sure got that one right when he came up with that, and he's a republican (now officially excommunicated)! It's a miracle!!!

Moscow Mitch, you are Putin's number one guy in the $enate. Queen of the Russo-Republican Party. Traitor, fist puppet of oligarchs, aider and abettor of the Trump-Putin plan for America. Where's your tiara Moscow Mitch? Stashed in a closet with all those bags of Russian rubles? Those "campaign contributions" better known as bribes? Is your tiara emblazoned with special Baltic Sea amber? Is it in a suitcase, wrapped up in the blueprints for that aluminum smelting plant that your oligarch buddy Oleg Deripaska promised to build for you in your home state as an additional bribe? Yeah, in your deep red, and we mean red, home state of Kentucky?

Moscow Mitch: You don't want to pass election security laws because demographics show that fair, honest, and un-fiddled with elections might give the democrats an advantage? You sell out your country. You smirk and say your Russo-Republican colleagues at the state level can "take care of it?" You know, as do we, that you need to assure your top, Donnie Trump, of his reelection by hook and by crook. One of the bills you boasted about sending to your "legislative graveyard" even proscribes a paper trail for every ballot. Can't have that now can we? How many more voting machine companies do we need to have owned by your Russian comrades? What's the frequency Moscow Mitch? How many will be enough for your Moscow Masters?

I tell ya what, Moscow Mitch: Since your boy Trump's one man sleazefest, Attorney General William Barr, has called for bringing back the death penalty for federal crimes, how about we dust off an old antique electric chair to use on you after we find you guilty of your treason? Maybe the one we fried your role models Julius and Ethel in? How ironic would that be?

You're so smug about this, Moscow Mitch. You operate in plain sight. Why? Because none of your Washington nest of accomplices, fellow travelers and comrades will do anything to rid us of you and your boss at 1600 Kremlin East.

We're going to, in fact, need a lot more of those lovely antique electric chairs. Feel the nice smooth wood, Moscow Mitch, as we strap you in. I know part of you is going to kinda like that part. We're gonna need enough chairs for every $enate Repug and any of their Democratic accomplices who sit idly by and do nothing about Putin's lap-dancing dummy, aka your president. And let's make the new electric chairs in America and have good, patriotic, talented union electricians wire them. Even better and maybe more appropriate Moscow Mitch, let's put you in one of those cages our I.C.E Gestapo toss kidnapped kids in. We can electrify the cage and wrap you in one of those aluminum blankets and then turn up the dial. No need for cooking instructions. Low, medium, or high; your choice, Moscow Mitch, although I'd love it if you'd go for low. Choose a nice simmer, let all that fat just melt off slowly into a reeking puddle of Moscow Mitch ooze. Yeah, I know that toxic waste is a problem but, hey, we can feed it to some pigs. They'll eat anything.