It's That Time Of Year: Time For "Crazy Republikook Uncle" Buzzword Bingo!

by Noah

I haven't posted one of these in several years but, just in time for Thanksgiving, I'm providing a sample bingo card that you can use to amuse yourselves if you have any crazy Republican relatives you feel compelled to celebrate Thanksgiving with. I choose not to break bread with such people, but those of you who do can just print this card out and/or make some similar ones just by using any bingo card generator found on the internet. Choose your words. Print the cards out. Distribute them to the non-Republicans around your Thanksgiving table and check off each box as the likely words or phrases come spitting out of the mouths of any reality-challenged knuckle-dragging Republikooks or bots that are holding back evolution on your family tree. See how long it takes before they realize that you're involved in some sort of humorous game and they are not. Behold the puzzlement!

Once they discover that all the normal people around the table have this bingo card and they don't, they're soon to start whining even more than usual. What to do if that happens? Well, for one thing, please don't stop laughing. Just grab those red MAGA hats that never leave their heads, fill them with nice warm turkey gravy, and put them back where they were!

Personally, if it was me, any family Republicans would get a separate and, ironically, unequal table in the garage, with the car motor running, and the doors locked. More turkey for you next year! How mean! How greedy! That's kind of act any Republican can relate to down to their last breaths.