Tuesday, January 09, 2018

Midnight Meme Of The Day!


-by Noah

When it comes to Fire And Fury, I guess SeƱor Trumpanzee can get the AudioBook version. But... maybe we should hold an immediate special election to select a designated reader or readers and rush them to the White House. Here's my list of candidates for the job. Maybe each one could read him a chapter. Please don't think I'm trying to induce a stroke of anything. I'm just a patriotic guy looking to help out. And, since he's not a man of letters, I've chosen a designated reader for each letter of the alphabet.

Wait, the more I think about it, the more I think that we should dispense with the special election and send all of these people, one by one. Each one would walk into the Oval Office and place one of those little wooden kids alphabet cubes on Trump's desk or in his playpen. The letter on the cube would, of course, be the letter next to their name on my list below.

A) Elizabeth Warren
B) Joe Biden
C) Lewis Black
D) Bernie Sanders
E) Ice T
F) Mr. T
G) Christopher Walken
H) Elmo
I) Rachel Maddow
J) Queen Latifah
K) Antifa (as a choir)
L) Hillary Clinton
M) Vicente Fox
N) Foxy Brown
O) Michelle Obama
P) Barrack Obama
Q) Alec Baldwin
R) Ellen
S) Stephen Colbert
T) Harvey Keitel
U) Oprah
V) The Central Park Five
W) Samantha Bee
X) Alan Grayson
Y) Chuck D
Z) Me

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At 4:29 AM, Anonymous Hone said...

Have no fear, Noah. Trump's listening skills are as impaired as his reading skills, so forget any auditory presentation of the book. He would tune out midway through the first sentence, let alone the first paragraph. He is incapable of processing information, visual or auditory. The only information he gets stems from himself and his feeble brain and this is in very short bites, interspersed with the three stories he repeats every ten minutes.

Today is the day of his physical. Unfortunately I strongly doubt the doctor will order neurological tests, which he certainly should.


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