Friday, December 18, 2015

Jade Helm 15. Republican World 2015 In Review-Chapter One


-by Noah

What better example of the 2015 Republican state of mind could I use to begin my 2015 review of Republican World than the classic, all too typical, paranoid Republican fantasy of Jade Helm 15?

It wasn’t enough when the denizens of Republican World convinced themselves that they better vote against Obama, not just because he’s one of "those people" but because he was going to "take away our guns." Well, two elections came and went, and no guns were confiscated. No tanks pulled up to suburban homes and pried away any iron from any cold, dead, hands.

Perhaps the Republican World explanation for Obama not "taking away our guns" was that the dreaded Obama had even more elaborate plans! What better means than to use the military at his disposal to take not just guns but homes, towns, whole states, even a whole region of the country; all part of his dastardly marxo-socialist Muslim plan! "How can you not see it," they said. "I read it on the internet," they said. "It was on the radio!"

In the real world, Jade Helm 15 was a two month long military exercise that began on July 15th. Military participants included regular military troops as well as special forces troops such as the Navy Seals and the Green Berets. It was planned to rehearse strategies for the protection of Americans. But, in Republican World, it was about the subjugation of Americans and so much more!

Republicans saw Jade Helm 15 as an attempt to install Obama Martial Law over a massive seven state region (Some even said 9, but perhaps they couldn’t count so well). youtube was flooded with clips, viewed by hundreds of thousands, from "citizen 'journalists'" who demonstrated a pathetic ability to make something nefarious out of any helicopter in the sky and any footage of military vehicles seen on roads anywhere.

For Republicans, "Thank you for your service" became "They’re coming! They’re coming!" It’s sad how people can say "We need a strong military," but, when they see it, they start buying as much ammo as they can afford; forming three man teams that they think could hold off a team of Navy Seals should they come knocking on the door.

FEMA, as usual, is a player in the minds of the paranoid--

Lest you think that such republicans are just some sort of delusional fringe wackos, keep in mind that even the governor of one of the seven states, Governor Greg Abbott of Texas, got in on the action. Writing to Major General Gerald Betty of the Texas State Guard, Abbott said,
"It is important that Texans know their safety, constitutional rights,
private property rights and civil liberties will not be infringed."
Gov. Abbott then ordered the Texas State Guard to be prepared to defend his state from the so-called great Obama takeover of 2015.

Sure, that state was Texas, so one would expect a crazy governor, but, keep in mind that Abbott was put in his office by a majority vote as was Senator "Ted" Cruz who, while speaking at the South Carolina Republican Convention on May 2nd, assured the audience that he had "reached out to the Pentagon to inquire about this exercise." Just three days later, another pride of Texas, Rep. Louis Gohmert issued a statement that tossed around phrases like “modern day Marshall Law’ and said,
"…the tone of the exercise needs to be completely revamped so the
federal government is not intentionally practicing war against its own
Appearing on the 700 Club, Gohmert also talked about citizen concerns that President Obama was targeting conservatives and said, referencing the fact that, for the exercise, Texas was labeled as "hostile territory."
"When my own Commander-in-Chief through his subordinates is just
fine with, for games purposes, declaring an enemy of two or more of
your states, I got a problem with that."
No, this Jade Helm 15 conspiracy thing is not fringe republican. It is mainstream republican. These are the people Republican voters put in office. Majority rules.

Republican radio favorite, Alex Jones may be the loon who put this all in motion when, on March 19th, in reference to Jade Helm 15, he stated that the federal government was preparing to invade Texas.
"Now this is just a cover for deploying the military on the streets…
This is an invasion… in preparation for the financial collapse and
maybe even Obama not leaving office."
On March 27th, the Alex Jones website featured a post that referenced Jade Helm 15 with the headline "Beyond Denial: Preparations For Martial Law." Jones also informed his followers that HELM stands for "Homeland Eradication of Local Militants."Nice to know. Be afraid. Be very afraid!

"Actor" Chuck Norris, most known for his Delta Force movies and, more recently backing Sen. John McCain for President while standing like a grinning idiot on campaign stages with him, fanned the flames with his column in WorldNetDaily, the folks who first broke the story that President Obama is gay and is secretly married to a man.

September 15th came and went. Jade Helm 15 ended. No martial law. No takeover. The people who buried their guns are probably now wandering around looking for their guns like a bunch of squirrels wondering where they buried all those nice acorns. Whoops! Don’t say 'acorn' in front of a Republican? That’s a whole different Obama plot!

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At 3:26 PM, Blogger Henny said...

Martial law, not Marshall. Still, the observations are spot on.

At 7:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

""We need a strong military," but, when they see it, they start buying as much ammo as they can afford; forming three man teams that they think could hold off a team of Navy Seals should they come knocking on the door."

What makes these Mein Yoot Men believe that they will get to re-enact the Alamo like this? At the first sign of such resistance, I can see Hellfires or tanks (see: Waco) being used. Why waste manpower proving how manly the enforcers are?

This isn't new. If these genie-asses knew their history, they would know that the US armies of late 1944-early 1945 were often chided by the Germans they captured for relying upon artillery and air power to win. Does one think for a moment that our GI Joes cared to be insulted by such a slur considering they won?

At 8:36 PM, Anonymous Noah said...

Thank you Henny. I really must slow down my proofreading sometimes, or, find a way to not get so bleary eyed. Then again, maybe, I just had a Ben Carson moment myself :)


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