More on our "courageous" right-wing loons, including the nutjob who wanted to ban gay players from the NFL

"Lucky Jack" Burkman sez: "If the NFL has no morals and no values, then Congress must find values for it."

"Ultimately, the bill proposed by lobbyist Jack Burkman isn’t aimed at keeping gay players out of NFL locker rooms.  Instead, it’s about keeping gay players in the closet."

-- from an NBC Sports blogpost today by Mike Florio

by Ken

You remember lobbyist Jack Burkman, don't you? He's the other "profile in courage" I tried my darnedest to make fun of night before last ("From Arizona to K Street: Profiles in courage, 2014 right-wing-loon-style ") -- the other being Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer. Governor Jan, of course, faced the thorny decision whether to sign or veto her state's spanking-new Religious Right to Hate bill, which would have allowed good Christians to abuse gay people any way they like as long as they pinky-swear that Jesus made them do it.

I say "would have allowed" because as we know, Governor Jan screwed up her courage yesterday and wielded her veto pen, as all the non-crazy people on the Right (including most of the Arizona business community) as well as the Left were urging her to do.

That just leaves the hard-core right-wing loons -- viz. HuffPost's "Conservative Pundits Lose It Over Veto Of Arizona's Anti-Gay Bill." Which is to say the people whose votes Governor Jan would have needed if she were going to run for another term as governor -- which causes the washingtonpost.com's Fix-master Chris Cillizza to conclude that her veto was simultaneously her announcement that she's not going to run.

Chris reminds us that when Governor Jan first presented herself for the Republican gubernatorial nomination -- after taking over for Janet Napolitano when she quit the governorship to become secretary of homeland -- she security was generally considered to be dead in the water until she pounced on the issue of Arizona's crackpot anti-immigration law, thereby courting the support of the very people Chris supposes would never support her now.

If any politician understands the political power in signing a controversial measure supported by the most conservative elements of your party, it's Brewer. Had she signed SB 1062, she would have enhanced her position among the most die-hard Republican primary voters -- even while taking a series of body blows from national Democratic (and Republican) leaders. But, unlike five years ago, Brewer chose a different path -- vetoing the legislation and insisting that there is no evidence to support the idea that business owners' rights could be violated by serving gays and lesbians.

Brewer has said she will make a decision on whether to seek reelection sometime around March 1. But, by exercising her veto power of SB 1062 tonight, she effectively has made her future plans known.

TO GET BACK TO "LUCKY JACK" BURKMAN

Lucky Jack, you'll recall, is the right-wing Washington lobbyist who stepped up to announce -- as the NFL for the first time faces a college draft with an announced-gay draft prospect, the University of Missouri's Michael Sam -- that he would propose a law to forbid the NFL.

"We are losing our decency as a nation," Lucky Jack declared. He also said, "If the NFL has no morals and no values, then Congress must find values for it."

The Hill's Rebecca Shabad reported (at the link above) that Lucky Jack's "four-lobbyist firm specializes in helping companies secure contracts with the federal government." In other words, our man Jack is an influence peddler, and one presumes that the influence he peddles traces back to the degenerate life forms that chair House committees and subcommittees.

What makes Lucky Jack think his opinion about anything except the best way to bribe a congressmember counts for anything at all is impossible to fathom. What makes him think that Congress has any business legislating employment policy to the NBC -- well, that's even impossibler to fathom.

The Hill's Rebecca Shabad reported (at the link above) that Lucky Jack's "four-lobbyist firm specializes in helping companies secure contracts with the federal government." In other words, our man Jack is an influence peddler, and one presumes that the influence he peddles traces back to the degenerate life forms that chair House committees and subcommittees.

Shabad also reported: "Burkman's firm, JM Burkman & Associates, signed 70 new clients last year, the most of any K Street firm, a recent review by The Hill found."

Just how eager all those shiny new clients are going to be to be repped by a public laughingstock remains to be seen; already there are reports of at least one client pulling out. (One wonders too how eager the government solons through whom Jack peddles their influence will be to do business with him.)No doubt Lucky Jack thought he could get himself some great business-building publicity from this crackpot stunt. Hmm, maybe not.

As noted at the top of this post, however, now that Lucky Jack has released the text of his bill, and it turns out to be a little different from what he represented previously. Here's more from NBC Sports's Mike Florio:

The proposed bill, titled The American Decency Act of 2014, prohibits NFL teams from employing "self-declared homosexual football players."  If that label weren't clear enough, the next sentence states that the bill "shall apply only in cases where a football player has openly declared himself to be a homosexual."

In other words, as long as the player doesn't come out as gay, there would be no problem.  Moreover, there would be no witch hunts or other efforts to out gay players.  The law would apply only if/when a player comes out publicly and openly as gay.

Even then, the openly-gay player wouldn't be banned from playing.  Instead, the team would have to give the player "facilities" that are "separate and distinct from the facilities used by heterosexual players."

As Burkman has explained, the bill provides for a fine of not less than $3 million and not more than $8 million.
Burkman will officially be unveiling the bill later today.  It's intended to be introduced to Congress.

Unless the Arizona legislature gets to it first.

Good one, Mike!

Of course, as many observers have been pointing out, Lucky Jack's terror scenario, innocent professional footballers showering alongside self-proclaimed homos, is kind of foolish when you consider that every NFL locker room already has gay players. Apparently it's OK for innocent NFL-ers to shower alongside gay players who haven't talked to Sports Illustrated about it.

Maybe we should cut Lucky Jack some slack. What more noble concern could there be than for the morals and decency of professional football players? I mean, that they not be forced to shower with announced-gay teammates.

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