If I was President

By NOAH   

Baucus deserves so much more

There have been countless, words written about the Health Care Crises which threatens to END our country. I, myself, have thought of a few far too wordy posts regarding this deadly serious matter. I am a Single Payer supporter. However, between work and my own health problems, I simply haven't had enough time to write. But, this morning, in a flash of inspiration and total frustration with the brigades of assclowns in Washington, it hit me that there was an easy way to get satisfaction on this issue.

As exemplified by U.S. Senawhore Max Baucus, the lowlifes in Washington refuse to listen. In a clear example of class warfare, they refuse to even give us the government health care plan that they get as a perk for their cushy do-nothing but collect cash gigs. Congress needs motivation to fix the problem instead of the current motivation not to fix the problem in the form of the bribes provided by the Insuro-Medical Bribery Squad on K Street. In a more righteous alternate reality, if I was President (dream music please) with the Pol Pot style power that Dickhead Cheney dreams about, here would be MY solution to the health Care Crises...

I would go to the House and Senate and tell them:

1) As of this moment, you no longer have government healthcare for yourselves or your families (not that such "people" give a damn about their families).

2) Also, as of this moment, you no longer have job security of any kind and can be recalled at a moment's notice and told to empty out your desk, including the Congressional Page that lives under it.

The Health Care Crisis would be solved in a week, if not sooner. It has become clear that these "people" will not listen to anything else.

At the same time, I would do to K Street what Hitler did to the Warsaw Ghetto, rounding up the Bribery Squad this time, folks who actually deserve to be rounded up. As a bonus, I would hire Iraq's former Republican Guards and Israel's top Commandos to work together to do the job, thus proving that we can indeed all get along just fine.

To pay for it all, I would set up a Pay Per View Television Show which would consist of Senawhores Max Baucus (D- Insurance Lobby) and Bitch McConnell (R- Insuro-Medical Complex) being stuffed into old wooden beer barrels with only their heads sticking out so we can get a good look at their ugly mugs as they are sent down the Niagara River and over Niagara Falls, (the Canadian side for a touch of irony)! It would be the most watched and cheered TV program in history. DVD sales would also go through the roof. The money could be used to find a cure for cancer and force Big Pharma into actually making it available.

Enough is ENOUGH! Vote for ME!!!!!!!!!!