Saturday, December 20, 2008

Does the Bush economic miracle have you looking for cheap entertainment for your holiday get-togethers? Play Buzzword Bingo!

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by Noah

During the holidays, most of us get together with our families, extended or otherwise. Many of us find ourselves in a room with relatives we ordinarily wouldn't speak with or maybe not even let into our homes if they were not in our families. Indeed, many progressives suffer the shame of having a Family Republikook -- possibly related by marriage, or maybe even a blood relative!

We wonder why, if they consider us so liberal, un-American, and unpatriotic, they even want to enter our homes. Are they just looking for a handout? The horror of having such a family member may best be dealt with by extreme measures. Perhaps the Family Repug is kept in the basement or in an upstairs closet with minimal food, drink, and Left Behind books slid under the door as an act of conservative-style compassion. Perhaps the F.R. has to eat outside at the backyard picnic table, regardless of the weather, fending off animals that are slyly pretending to be endangered.

In any event, as soon as we let such weirdos into our homes, it's only a matter of time before certain words or phrases come out of their foaming mouths. For this, I offer Family Get-Together Buzzword Bingo, designed to add a little fun to what is often a real exasperating day. I made it myself.

FAMILY GET-TOGETHER BUZZWORD BINGO

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