REPUBLICAN FAMILY VALUES: THE MITCH McCONNELL, ANN COULTER AND MATT SANCHEZ TRIANGLE OF REAL PERVERSION AND REAL BIGOTRY

Harold Meyerson's column in today's Washington Post explains why the wing-nuts have the whole family values thing ass-backwards. Historically, the authoritarian right always professes to hate sex and their foot soldiers buy right into it. The passions that sex can unleash are too unpredictable for the straitjacketed kind of mind that is attracted to authoritarian movements.

As conservatives tell the tale, the decline of the American family, the rise in divorce rates, the number of children born out of wedlock all can be traced to the pernicious influence of one decade in American history: the '60s.

The conservatives are right that one decade, at least in its metaphoric significance, can encapsulate the causes for the family's decline. But they've misidentified the decade. It's not the permissive '60s. It's the Reagan '80s.

The erosion of the "typical American family," which has mostly affected working class families, is a direct bi-product of the economic pressures of the brand of unrestricted Greed and Selfishness Capitalism pushed by clueless, egghead right-wing ideologues and their GOP allies. "Over the past 35 years, the massive changes in the U.S. economy have largely condemned American workers to lives of economic insecurity. No longer can the worker count on a steady job for a single employer who provides a paycheck and health and retirement benefits, too. Over the past three decades, workers' individual annual income fluctuations have consistently increased, while their aggregate income has stagnated. In the brave new economy of outsourced jobs and short-term gigs and on-again, off-again health coverage, American workers cannot rationally plan their economic futures. And with each passing year, as their level of economic security declines, so does their entry into marriage. Yet the very conservatives who marvel at the efficiency of our new, more mobile economy and extol the 'flexibility' of our workforce decry the flexibility of the personal lives of American workers. The right-wing ideologues who have championed outsourcing, offshoring and union-busting, who have celebrated the same changes that have condemned American workers to lives of financial instability, piously lament the decline of family stability that has followed these economic changes as the night the day."

The right-wing ideology that powers the Republican Party has fueled the crisis in the traditional family and family values that the party continually runs against. What a racket! And, as Meyerson reminds us, there is no candidate that best personifies a decline in family values than the current Republican front-runner, Rudy Giuliani.

I'm not certain, however-- and Meyerson doesn't touch it-- why so many closeted (as in self-loathing) homosexuals are attracted to the Republican Party. Sometimes it seems that half three quarters of the upper echelon of the GOP is a gay mafia screaming about the dangers of same sex marriage while prowling public toilets and seducing underage boys. And it certainly didn't start with now exposed Florida gay congressman Mark Foley or still unexposed Kentucky gay senator Mitch McConnell-- and it ain't ending there either. The party that deifies Ann Coulter's gutter bigotry is also the party that covers up for sexual predators in its own midst.

And a new media frenzy-- worthy of a Brittney Spears head-shave or a Paris Hilton drug bust or a Jeff Gannon sleepover at the Bush White House-- is starting to form around another right wing ex-porn star/male prostitute pushed into the public consciousness by the Republican Noise Machine, particularly Fox "News." In fact, unless you're a Fox viewer-- or hire gay hookers-- you have probably never heard of Matt Sanchez. And you're better off.


O'Reilly and Hannity introduced this hunky USMC reservist, Columbia University student and die-hard wing-nut to America on their GOP propaganda broadcasts. He came on to whine about Ivy League anti-military attitudes and, of course, he was a big star at this year's CPAC (where he got some kind of award not related to his penis size). But while Ann Coulter was trying to smear devoted family man John Edwards as a "faggot," Mr. Sanchez may have been wondering if anyone would out him as gay porn "actor" Rod Majors, star of the Republican family values flics, Jawbreaker, Donkey Dick and Glory Holes Of Fame 3. I don't know what Ann Coulter has to say about his much-touted "eleven inch uncut monster cock" but no doubt it had fellow CPAC attendee Mitch McConnell's little heart aflutter. McConnell never got to pose for a picture-- that we know of-- with Mr. Sanchez because Ann Coulter was all over him.

Of course, Senator McConnell doesn't need to contact someone like Sanchez at CPAC. He can find him through his ads and hire him for a personal session if he'd like. He only charges $200 (in) and $250 (out). By the way, don't hit that link if you're offended by photos of the male anatomy and descriptions of what Republican closet queens do with each other when no one is looking. Sanchez has his own website with a picture of his gal Ann (no photos of McConnell or Foley or McCrery or Dreier) and he's all excited about his moment of fame. I wonder when he gets a sleep over at the White House. Karl?


UPDATE: DIRTY SANCHEZ... WILL HE MARRY MITCH McCONNELL?

I told some of my friends about this silly story. One, Seymour, who's an older gay man, is very impressed with Mr. Sanchez' pecs and called him for a private session. I'll let you know how it went if it really happens. Another, Jimmy, who's straight but calls himself "gay friendly," said he needs to see a photo of Dirty Sanchez and Dirty Ann. John Amato tracked one down for me and here it is. (Happy, Jimmy?) Now me... I want a picture of Sanchez and McConnell. The photos on this website don't seem to include McConnell... but they do include everything else-- and I mean everything. So... ladies and gentleman, be warned, this site is for serious research only and not for anyone with weak knees.