"MAN ON DOG" SANTORUM RUNNING FROM THE FAR RIGHT-- BUT HE IS THE FAR RIGHT! NOW HE'S SUDDENLY AGAINST CREATIONISM!

When right wing extremist loon Rick "Man On Dog" Santorum speaks to national newspapers like the NY TIMES, WASHINGTON POST or, his favorite, THE MOONIE TIMES, he's always posturing to look good for the Far Right base he had hoped would propel him into the presidency. Now Mr. Opus Dei is looking at almost certain defeat in the 2006 Senate race and he's talking very differently to local papers that Pennsylvania voters read. In yesterday's BEAVER COUNTY TIMES, Ricky had changed his tune considerably. Suddenly Senator Religionist Maniac is saying "intelligent design" (AKA- creationism) has no place in a science classroom. Why it seemed like only yesterday that Santorum was penning an editorial in "Reverend" Sun Myung Moon's right-wing WASHINGTON TIMES that "intelligent design is a legitimate scientific theory that should be taught in the classroom." Why the change of heart?

Well, for one thing Santorum has the lowest approval ratings of any U.S. Senator anywhere and among pundits of both parties-- who rarely agree on anything-- he is unanimously considered the most endangered incumbent Senator up for re-election. (In fact rumors are rife that the national Republican Party has given up on this race already and has told Santorum's allies that he shouldn't count on them for cash-- but we wish you all the best and good luck and thanks for the memories.) On top of that Santorum watched with other swing state Republicans as moderate suburban Republicans thoroughly deserted GOP candidates in last week's elections in neighboring New Jersey and Virginia.

But worst of all for Santorum, the loony creationism issue has come front and center in Pennsylvania because his own allies from the extreme right of the PA GOP have pushed it into the headlines, disastrously for themselves. A federal court just ended the testimony phase of a much ballyhooed trial in which 8 families sued the Dover Area School District in eastern Pennsylvania. After 8 radical religionist nutcases from Santorum's wing of the GOP were elected to the district's school board, they insisted on introducing "intelligent design" into science classes. "This is Pennsylvania, not Kansas or some other primitive backwater," said one horrified parent. The 8 families said the policy violated the constitutional separation of church and state and sued. Although the court hasn't issued a ruling yet, the people of the district-- Santorum's employers-- have. On Tuesday all 8 of the lunatic fringe religionist Republicans were defeated-- 8 for 8-- and replaced by normal Americans. This caused another of Santorum's crazy allies, make-believe "Reverend" Pat Robertson to threaten Dover, PA with God's wrath. Panicked, Santorum issued a statement immediately trying to distance himself from his close association with Robertson. "I disagree. I don't believe God abandons people."

Although Santorum suddenly avoided Bush's most recent visit to his state, even though the local Democratic congressman was brave enough to appear on the same stage with Bush (having voting against virtually all of Bush's harebrained, reactionary schemes over the last 5 years), he hasn't addressed Bush's well-publicized support for teaching creationism in science classes. (This past weekend Santorum, desperate to appear not-Bush, told a Philly audience, according to the BEAVER COUNTY TIMES that "mistakes had been made in the Iraq war, and that at least a portion of the blame lies with the White House.") At least.

Bob Casey will make an infinitely better U.S. Senator.