Sunday, August 24, 2003

[8/24/2011] Bob and Ray Tonight: Part 1 of "Spelling Bee" -- the annual Bob and Ray Grand National Spelling Bee Contest (continued)

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"What kind of a badger game is this?"
-- contestant Betsy Ross, in tonight's installment of "Spelling Bee"


from Write If You Get Work:
The Best of Bob & Ray
(1975)

Part 1


RAY: Well, Bob, it's that time again, the finals of the annual Bob and Ray Grand National Spelling Bee Contest. Do you happen to have the regional winners here?
BOB: Our three regional semifinalists arrived here in New York last week. I wonder if you will step up to our microphones and identify yourselves. You are . . . ?
BETSY ROSS: I'm Betsy W. Ross from Fredericksburg, Maryland.
BOB: You're the winner from the middle Atlantic states?
BETSY ROSS: That's right.
BOB: Russell Plume, are you here?
BENJAMIN FRANKLIN: Russell couldn't be here.
BOB: Well, Russell was the Southern states champion . . . Well, who are you?
FRANKLIN: I'm Benjamin Franklin from Altoona, Pennsylvania, and I'm gonna substitute for him.
BOB: Well, who do you represent?
FRANKLIN: I'll represent the Southern states, if I may.
BOB: And our last contestant from the West Coast . . .
PAUL G. REVERE: Paul G. Revere.
BOB: Paul G. Revere.
REVERE: From Elmont, Utah.
BOB: All right, you two gentlemen and the lady are the regional winners, and as you know, we are going to give you one round of words in the first go-around in our national semifinals. If you answer correctly, you will hear . . .
[Sound: Tinkle of bell]
And if you answer wrong, it's . . .
[Sound: Buzzer]
Now the words will be chosen out of this barrel which has been turned over so that they are all mixed up, and I think we will let our lady go first. Miss Ross, will you pick your first word?
ROSS: All right, here you are.
BOB: Your word, Miss Ross, is "Paleolithic."
ROSS: Paleolithic.
BOB: Pertaining to an era in the development of this earth.
ROSS: Capital P-A-L-E-O-L-I-T-H-I . . . M.
[Buzzer]
BOB: No, I'm sorry, the last letter should have been "C," Miss Ross. Better luck next time in the second round. Let's move along with Mr. Plume, or rather Mr. Plume's proxy . . .
FRANKLIN: Franklin.
BOB: Mr. Benjamin Franklin, you will have to reach in and hand me the word.
FRANKLIN:: Okay, here you are.
BOB: The word you have chosen from our barrel of words is "Interfenestration," the spacing of windows.
FRANKLIN: Interfenestration . . . I-N-T-E-R-F-E-N-E-S-T-R-A-T-I-O . . . B.
[Buzzer]
BOB: No, I'm sorry, you missed by one letter, Mr. Franklin. The last letter is "N." You'll take your seat next to Miss Ross, and our final semifinalist is Mr. Revere of Elmont, Utah. Will you hand me your word?
REVERE: Sure.
BOB: Your word is the interrogative "Who."
ROSS [interrupting]: Now, wait a minute!
BOB: Give him a chance.
ROSS: Well, I had a real tough one!
BOB: I'm sorry, but you choose your own words.
REVERE: Who . . . W-H-O.
[Tinkle of bell]
BOB: "Who" is right.
ROSS: What kind of a badger game is this? I had "Paleolithic" and he had "interfenestration."
BOB: And so that makes Paul Revere the winner of round one.
ROSS: And this big lunkhead gets "who."
BOB: And we will be back with round two after this commercial.

[TO BE CONTINUED]


TOMORROW NIGHT IN PART 2 OF BOB AND RAY'S "SPELLING BEE": Will Paul Revere continue his domination over Betsy Ross and Benjamin Franklin in round two? And what will the commercial be?


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