Wednesday, May 04, 2016

"We've Never Owned a Democrat Before..."


Purchase a Democrat? I'll have to ask my friends how that works out (source; click to enlarge).

by Gaius Publius

All in the spirit of fun. If you like your politics with a touch of humor, Andy Borowitz and the Borowitz Report are terrific reads.

Borowitz in the New Yorker, a taste:
Koch Brothers Consider Purchasing First Democrat
By Andy Borowitz

WICHITA (The Borowitz Report)—Charles and David Koch, the billionaire industrialists who have spent decades acquiring a world-class collection of Republicans, revealed over the weekend that they are considering purchasing their first Democrat.

“We’ve always bought Republicans, and our father bought Republicans before us,” Charles, the elder Koch, said. “They’re bred to be obedient, and they respond to simple commands.”

He said that he and his brother had considered acquiring a Democrat only after determining that none of the Republicans on offer this year was worth adding to their collection.

“It’s kind of a scary proposition for us, because we’ve never owned a Democrat before,” he said. “We don’t really know what we should be looking for.”

Koch said that he and his brother learned, after making some phone calls, that other oligarchs have bought Democrats in the past, and “had good experiences with them.”

“That was very reassuring,” he said. ...
Read the rest. It won't take long and you'll get a smile from the last sentence.

Are the Kochs Really Buying a Democrat?

Does news like this mean the Kochs are actually thinking of buying a Democrat? Unlikely, though as their electoral fortunes fall, many could be for sale at increasingly interesting prices. More likely, though, the Kochs are trying to throw a scare into Donald Trump, to soften him up for a better deal — for them — should he make it to the Oval Office.

Still, I don't think I'd make light of the opportunity if I had more money than a thousand of me could spend. Many Democrats are definitely priced to go, and if the downward voting trend and rising hubris continue, many, including the very high, may well be had at discounts normally reserved for volume buyers only. 


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At 6:47 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Actually, democrats don't come cheap... and they might just be buying into a dead market. If Bernie and the DNC keep diverging (taking their "respective" electorates with them, one hopes), the "party" MIGHT just go poof soon.

While history shows that $hillbillary would only be too happy to share themselves with anyone with a 7-figure check, they certainly would have to try to keep this particular co-ownership arrangement $tealthy... if they have ANY hope of keeping their bamboozle of 10s of millions of American imbeciles (who hate a little less than the Rs) active. Not an impossible task, history would indicate.

Seriously, the kochs pondering that $hillbillary would be "better"; the weekly standard almost surely endorsing as well; goldman sachs; Syria, Libya, Honduras, Iraq...; the nearly bare corruption/money laundering scam of the Clinton foundation; the linear connection between the money, dnc and Clintons AND the impenetrable firewall between them and the Sanders' campaign/movement??? How much would it take to get $hillbillary's imbeciles to wake the eff up???


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