Monday, August 06, 2007

PYGMIES MAKE A JOINT APPEARANCE IN IOWA-- NO ONE SAYS ANYTHING WORTH RELEMBERING; NO ONE CARES

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A YouTube debate it wasn't. In fact, it wasn't really much of a debate, just a joint appearance by the "pathetic bunch of pygmies"™ at Drake University in Des Moines, where each of the pretenders to George W. Bush's throne did his best to denegrate the Democrats in front of an audience made up entirely of Republican activists and patients from the Cherokee Mental Health Institute in nearby Cherokee, many of whom are Republican activists.

The pygmies-- not counting Ron Paul, who the other pygmies won't talk to-- all agreed that the war in Iraq is progressing. They're all kind of caught between a rock and a hard place, the American public's disenchantment with the continued diastrous occupation of Iraq and the Republican base (the deciders) belief that the war is going swimmingly and is being well-led by brilliant military tacticans and strategists George Bush, Dick Cheney, Ann Coulter and Bill O'Reilly.  I watched Jane sum this up perfectly today on CNN, leaving some right wing kook sputtering that it isn't fair to bring up Bush's name when discussing Republican presidential politics. C&L has the video.

Except when Brownback and Flip Flop Mitt got into a little tussle about Romney's confusion about women's choice, the candidates managed to avoid attacking each other. But they all wanted to, at least subtly, distance themselves from Bush while embracing him. So they tried to paint Cheney as a semi-bad guy and while supporting everything that Cheney stands for. They were all pro-occupation, although McCain was the most aggressive about it. "We are winning. We must win. And we will not set a date for surrender, as the Democrats want us to do," said McCain, who claimed the war was "mismanaged," although he didn't say by whom. Giuliani was equally disingenuous. It goes over well with the base, and the inmates from Cherokee ate it up. As usual Flip Flop Mitt was the most confused and the most prepared to change any and all positions at any moment. "I can tell you I'm not a carbon copy of George Bush," he tried, the immediately reminding the audience he supports the escalation in Iraq. (Romney also tried deploying the cheap Giuliani shot about 9/11 against poor, hapless Ron Paul, although it didn't get as strong a reaction as it did when Giuliani, who has a better sense of the jugular than the terminally lame Romney, first rolled it out with venom dripping from both corners of his mouth.


UPDATE: THE MORE IOWA VOTERS GET TO SEE OF THE SLIMY GIULIANI THE MORE THEY RUN-- IN THE OTHER DIRECTION

Iowa Republicans are so disgusted with Giuliani that they are actually flocking to the flip flopping Mormon empty suit. Overall, though, the Republicans are none too happy with the flcok of presidential wannabe's they've been presented with this year. Looks like Newt was right when he dubbed them collectively the "pathetic bunch of pygmies"™.


UPDATE: WHAT DO THE NUTS WANT?

The extreme right-wing bloggers polled themselves and came up with their ideal candidate-- and a list of who they want most and who they despise most. "None of the Above" wasn't included. They want Jeri Fred Thompson, the Republican lobbyist with almost as few core values as Mitt Romney. This is the list that balances the most liked and least liked (with some kind of cockamamie score):
1- Jeri Fred Thompson (80.5)
2- Duncan Hunter (51.5)
3- Rudy Giuliani (49.5)
4- Flip Flop Mitt (35.25)
5- Mike Huckabee (11.25)
6- Newt Gingrich (7.5)
7- Tom Tancredo (-12)
8- Tommy Thompson (-40.5)
9- John McCain (-44)
10- Sam Brownback (-51)
11- Ron Paul (-77.5)



UPDATE ON THE UPDATE: POOR RUDY

It's true that the more Iowans get to know Giuliani, the more repulsed they are by him-- sort of like New Yorkers. But also like his own family. His 17 year old daugher Caroline is supporting Obama. And now everybody's embarrassed and she has to go to bed without dinner.

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2 Comments:

At 11:11 AM, Blogger Hackwhackers said...

"Extreme right wing bloggers polled themselves. ." Heh heh, hope it had lots of splinters.

 
At 7:26 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"in front of an audience made up entirely of Republican activists and patients from the Cherokee Mental Health Institute in nearby Cherokee, many of whom are Republican activists"

Sort of like if the Democrats held a debate in front of an AFL/CIO audience, right?

 

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