A Timely Adaptation Of The Passover Seder Song

-by Princess Ozma

Dayenu

If he were only a racist
Dayenu!

If he were only a misogynist
Dayenu!

If he were only a xenophobe
Dayenu!

If he were not such a twit
Dayenu!

If he didn’t assault women
Dayenu!

If he didn’t brag about it
Dayenu!

If he didn’t put children into cages
Dayenu!

If he didn’t pardon war criminals
Dayenu!

If he didn’t praise child molesters
Dayenu!

If he didn’t mock the disabled
Dayenu!

If he didn’t coddle dictators
Dayenu!

If he didn’t trash allies
Dayenu!

If he didn’t abandon friends
Dayenu!

If he didn’t threaten civil servants
Dayenu!

If he didn’t threaten lawmakers and judges
Dayenu!

If he didn’t threaten the press
Dayenu!

If he didn’t lie constantly
Dayenu!

If he were only a thug
Dayenu!

If he didn’t need fixers
Dayenu!

If he were only a parasite
Dayenu!

If he were only the king of debt
Dayenu!

If he didn’t bankrupt the country
Dayenu!

If he really cared about anyone besides himself
Dayenu!

If he protected the vulnerable
Dayenu!

If he were only a con artist
Dayenu!

If he were only a coward
Dayenu!

If he were only a bully
Dayenu!

If he were only corrupt
Dayenu!

If he didn’t stiff his contractors
Dayenu!

And use “charities’ as scams
Dayenu!

If he didn’t exploit the vulnerable
Dayenu!

If he didn’t trash science
Dayenu!

If he didn’t trash the truth
Dayenu!

If he didn’t trash the planet
Dayenu!

If he had a shred of decency
Dayenu!

If he didn’t ignore the warnings
Dayenu!

If he didn’t insult everyone
Dayenu!

If he believed in democracy
Dayenu!

If he believed in a free press
Dayenu!

If he didn’t believe he was above the law
Dayenu!

If he were only Putin’s puppet
Dayenu!

If he didn’t lie to the American people every day
Dayenu!

If he were not such a selfish pig
Dayenu!

If he weren’t such a poor excuse for a human being
Day Dayenu, Day Dayenu, Day Dayenu, Dayenu, Dayenu!

MAGA by Chip Proser