A Total And Complete Ban On Donald J. Trump (And Other White House Personnel) Re-entering Our Country

-by Noah

I, Noah, am proposing a total and complete shutdown of so-called President Trump, and his associates, re-entering the United States, until our country’s investigators can figure out what the hell is going on. We have no choice. We have no choice. Until we are able to determine and understand the full extent of the problems and the dangerous threats they pose, our country cannot continue to be the victim of horrendous attacks by people that believe only in their own enrichment and have no sense of reason or respect for us.

On Friday, Donald Trump, aka “Don the Con,” aka “Putin’s Pet President,” left for Saudi Arabia, home of the planners, perpetrators, and financiers of the 9/11 attacks on America, aboard Air Force One with a gang of White House associates which included former Republican Party head Reince Preibus, fellow white supremacy advocates Stephen Miller and Steve Bannon, spokesjokers Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Sean “Bushman” Spicer, Secretary of State Rex “Exxon” Tillerson and others of their reeking ilk; a whole plane load; snakes on a plane indeed.

Kellyanne Conway was left behind. I bet she’s steaming mad. She’d probably bought a new toy soldier outfit and everything. Not to worry for Kellyanne, though, she’s probably convinced herself that she’s in charge of the White House until the return of her man. I hope she gives a nice press conference while the boss is gone. It would be very entertaining. Don’t forget to order that truckload of shredding machines Donny asked you to get, Kellyanne.

The first thing Trump did upon arriving in Saudi Arabia was give the Saudis a sweet $150 Billion arms deal which could end up being worth over $350 Billion. In return, Trump received Saudi Arabia’s highest civilian civilian honor, a tremendously tacky gold (his favorite, of course) necklace with a large medal attached to it would make the other oddly coiffed Mr. T (the good one), or any boastful rapper proud. The first lady is probably wondering where hers is. Note to Melania: it’s a Muslim country. Women don’t get jewelry. They do get beheaded though, so watch it. But, rest assured, Ivanka is probably already planning numbered, made in China, limited edition replicas packaged in a nice box.

In a perfect world, Trump will, some day soon, have to pawn the weighty necklace. Also, in a perfect world, none of those weapons, designed and built by Americans, will end up being used against Americans, either here or abroad. Hopefully, they won’t end up being used against Israel in some future seven-day war, either.

Don the Con’s official itinerary also includes a visit to the aforementioned Israel, unless, of course, they have the good sense to ban him from their country for giving away their intelligence to his Russian masters in last week’s Oval Office meeting, thus putting Israel’s agents at risk of exposure and death. To date, there is no word if any Israeli agents gathering intelligence on ISIS have died due to Trump’s idiocy. We may never know the answer to that one, but, one thing is for sure, Don the Con don’t give a damn. That’s the kind of guy he is. To him, intelligence agents aren’t hard-working patriots; they are no more than lawn jockeys.

The unofficial itinerary will be more interesting. Will there be secret meetings with more Russians? Will Anti-education secretary Betsy DeVos’s brother, Erik “Blackwater” Prince be setting them up. Is that what he was doing already at his recent Seychelles meeting with a noted criminal Russian oligarch? Does anyone know for sure where Mike Flynn is right now? Sure, Exxon Rex Tillerson will be happy in his oily element, but where will Spicy Spicer hide in a land without bushes? Will the forecast include showers?

We can assume that Bannon and Miller are busy telling anti-Jew jokes to the Saudi “dignitaries” while Priebus and the Trumpanzee cheer them on. Now, that’s diplomacy!

Our history is full of good presidents, bad presidents and mediocre presidents from a variety of parties, but Don the Con Trump is a uniquely un-American president. Trumpcare alone stands to kill more Americans than a thousand 9/11 attacks. Then there are his environmental policies. At the end of the day, Trump and his crony accomplices in Congress are terrorists that will kill numbers of Americans that their fellow demented humans in ISIS and Al Qaeda only dream about. Air Force One is a planeload of undesirables; not the kind of people that our customs officials ordinarily allow into what can still be our country.

Trump rode into the White House on a wave of unprecedented support from our corporate media and their corporate masters. He received $3 billion in free exposure as TV stations broadcast the hateful diatribes he regaled his hate-filled audiences with on a nightly basis. There was no “extreme vetting.”

I know that turning Air Force One away is just wistful fantasy thinking of a better world; same with confiscating his passport and burning it, but better countries are always started as a dream. This is a golden opportunity: such a shame to miss it. We could send Don the Con endless film clips of Americans, real Americans, cheering from the rooftops. Let him tweet all he wants.