Sandwich Watch: End of an era -- the sandwich and deli worlds mourn as Philip Roth says almost 80 years' worth of sandwiches is enough

But skeptical sandwich observers ask, was it really his last?


Let the record show that this corned-beef job was not Philip Roth's last sandwich, which was reported by The Borowitz Report to have been a turkey with lettuce and tomato on whole wheat (condiments unspecified -- surely not dry?).

"Not only have I had my last sandwich, I have made my final public statement about sandwiches."

-- novelist and essayist Philip Roth, to a Dutch
interviewer, as reported by The Borowitz Report

by Ken

Well, we knew this day had to come. It was one thing when Philip Roth revealed that he was done with writing. Now, however, comes the real blow: The Borowitz Report reports that the great American writer has scarfed his last sandwich.

Already, though, some sandwich skeptics are less than certain, pointing to the obvious wiggle room contained in his own "final public statement about sandwiches," and noting as well that nothing stops the multi-honored American novelist and essayist, who turned 81 in March, from simply going back on his declaration.

Still, the general reaction was that this is indeed the end of an era.

May 20, 2014
PHILIP ROTH SAYS HE HAS HAD HIS LAST SANDWICH
Posted by ANDY BOROWITZ


NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—The novelist Philip Roth announced today that a sandwich he ate last week, a turkey one with lettuce and tomato on wheat, would be his last.

Roth’s retirement from sandwich eating, announced in an interview with a Dutch literary magazine, came as a surprise to the worlds of publishing and sandwiches.

In the interview, Roth attempted to soft-pedal the reasons behind his startling decision, saying only, “I had my first sandwich when I was three or four. That’s almost eighty years ago. That’s a lot of sandwiches.”

The response to Mr. Roth’s renunciation of sandwiches was skeptical, with some readers of the interview questioning whether the acclaimed novelist had not left the door open a crack to sandwiches in his future.

When asked by his Dutch interviewer if he had sworn off deli meats, Roth said, “I could see a situation at a buffet where they’d have those mini slices of rye bread, and I’d make an open-faced thingy with roast beef and maybe a pickle or whatnot. But that’s not the same thing as a sandwich.”

As if to quell any misunderstanding, on Tuesday afternoon Roth issued the following statement through his publisher: “Not only have I had my last sandwich, I have made my final public statement about sandwiches.”

TOMORROW: "HOW WRONG WE WERE," JONATHAN 
MIRSKY RECALLS, 25 YEARS AFTER TIANANMEN


NYRB caption: "General Secretary of the Communist Party Zhao Zhiyang (left) talking to protesters in Tiananmen Square with future premier Wen Jiabao behind him, May 19, 1989"

How wrong we were—foreign reporters (I was a correspondent for The Observer in those days), China-watchers abroad, and many Chinese themselves. . . . I wrote several opinion pieces for my paper . . . surer about Chinese affairs than I had ever been.

Can you figure out what Mirsky and all those other "foreign reporters, China-watchers abroad, and many Chinese themselves" were so sure and so wrong about?

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