The Republican Party's Latest Entrant In Their Endless Parade Of Freaks

-by Noah

I admit it. I’ve been silent lately. I haven’t posted on DWT in a few months. Been busy, had health issues, and maybe most of all been just plain struck speechless at the Republican Freakshow (although, rest assured, I’ve been making some notes for my annual yearend mutterings.) Anyway, we may already have a winner in the Quote Of The Year contest. I can remain silent no longer!
 
Here’s Republican Rep. Todd Akin (R-MO), the party’s glorious candidate for Senator from Missouri. He’s running against Sen. Claire McCaskill and has some novel thoughts pertaining to rape, pregnancy and the abortion issue. It seems that there is, in Republican circles at least, a notion that there is such a thing as “legitimate rape” vs. some other kind, and, that women usually don’t get pregnant from rape because, mysteries that women are, they can prevent that somehow.

“First of all, from what I understand from doctors (pregnancy from rape) is really rare. If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.”

Yeah. This is way beyond the Republican concept of "Pray Away The Gay." Them females and their mysterious, devious wiles and ways. Why I hear them womenfolk can change the sex of the baby right in the womb! Hair color, too!
 
Since we already have the Romney concept of “self deportation,” why don’t we just call this one self-abortion or magic-mind birth control? I think we need to run a check on what back of the matchbook courses Akin’s Missouri doctors got their medical degrees from.
 
While we’re at it, I think we also need to do a check on all Republicans, nationwide, and see their birth certificates. Apparently aliens have been transporting them here from the 1300s in time machines.  Maybe even further: Cave people in suits and ties.
 
Forget voter ID. We need IQ tests for candidates, drug tests, too! If we’d had the IQ test a few years ago, Sarah Palin would still be worrying about witches casting spells upon her in Alaska while she and the hubby were looking into secession. 
 
Aiken has been called a “courageous conservative” by FOX host and pompous, holier-than-thou smarmtoad Mike Hackabee. Among other things Aiken, sits on the House Committee on Science, Space and Technology. Well, we all know what Republicans think of that science stuff. This goon manages to participate in the Republican War on Science and their War on Women simultaneously! Did he vote for Rep. Paul Ryan’s budget? You bet, and he’s partnered with Ryan several other times, including on their “No Taxpayer Funding For Abortion Act” where these two Einsteins came up with the concept of “forcible rape” (as opposed to the other kind?). Now, Repug Golden Child Ryan happens to think that the language in the bill doesn’t go far enough in preventing abortion in cases of rape, friendly, happy, or otherwise, but I guess, to Akin, it’s a moot point if a woman can shut down her mysterious, confounding internal systems.

Want another quote from this troglodyte? Here he (it?) is talking to his buddy Tony Perkins of the Family Research Council just last summer.

“The heart of liberalism really is a hatred of God and the belief thatgovernment should replace God.”

Akin has been re-elected by his district 5 times since 2000 and now half of Missouri apparently likes this knuckle-dragging fool. Can you say inbreeding? One thing’s for sure, if you ever find yourself driving through Missouri, just keep driving and don’t dare spend the night. I bet it gets really scary after dark. Children Of The Corn and Night Of The Living Dead all rolled into one. You’ll be attacked by swarms of chanting Republicans stumbling around and unable to see because their heads are stuck up their asses.


UPDATES: I'll just add to this list for Noah as they come in over the day


You know Denny Rehberg (R-MT), another GOP House genius who is running for Senate this year. He knows Akin better than most of us do. "As a pro-life conservative, a husband, and a father of two young women, I find Representative Akin's remarks to be offensive and reprehensible," Rehberg said in a statement blasted out by his campaign late Sunday night. "There is no such thing as a 'legitimate rape.' I condemn Representative Akin's statements in the strongest possible terms." The Romney/Ryan campaign also tip-toed away from Akin. “Governor Romney and Congressman Ryan disagree with Mr. Akin’s statement,” the Romney campaign said in statement. “A Romney-Ryan administration would not oppose abortion in instances of rape.” (I wonder if they checked that with Ryan, who has consistently voted against that exemption for his entire misogynistic career.)

Romney still hasn't asked Akin to withdraw from the Missouri Senate race-- says there are "no plans to" as of now-- but in a interview this morning with National Review he said that Akin’s comments on rape are “insulting, inexcusable, and, frankly, wrong. Like millions of other Americans, we found them to be offensive." I guess they won't be campaigning together. I wonder if Romney knows that Akin and Ryan are soul brothers when it comes to women's issues.

Scott Brown (R-MA) doesn't want Akin as part of the Republican Senate caucus. Akin has until tomorrow to withdraw and after first calling on him to resign, Brown is now suggesting he withdraw and step aside for someone who would have a better chance to win. "As a husband and father of two young women, I found Todd Akin's comments about women and rape outrageous, inappropriate and wrong. There is no place in our public discourse for this type of offensive thinking. Not only should he apologize, but I believe Rep. Akin's statement was so far out of bounds that he should resign the nomination for US Senate in Missouri." McCaskill worked hard to make sure Akin would be her opponent and now the whole country sees why.

Everyone is focusing on the deranged anti-Choice legislation Akin and Paul Ryan worked on together but Ryan isn't the only right-wing crackpot who has helped nurture Akin's crazy career. Mike Huckabee was key to helping him win the nomination against two more mainstream conservatives. At the time, Huckabee said "Always placing principles over politics, Congressman Akin has remained true to our conservative ideals, especially his belief in the sanctity of human life." No comment from the holier-than-thou slob today. Bachmann, Congress' most notorious publicity hound is also quiet today, but two months ago, she was butting into the Missouri primary: "I am proud to endorse Congressman Akin in his bid for the US Senate. I’ve known Todd for years and worked well with him in the House. He’s a principled conservative and will make a great United States Senator.” And so was Steve King, another extremist lunatic: "Congressman Todd Akin is my friend, he is running for the United States Senate and he is the man that will always stand on the principles that we believe in.  Too many people bend or sway in the wind or they get drawn into the mesmerizing idea that somehow someone can guide you up through a leadership channel if you just go along to get along.  He is not going to put up a vote for the sake of going along to get along and neither will I.  We have a sacred obligation to all of you, that’s to keep our oath of office.  That’s to protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.  I look forward to the day that he is sworn into the United States Senate, because I want to pass out of the house the repeal of Obamacare, and I want to send it over to Todd in the Senate to do the same." 

Another Republican radical who backed Akin but who's nowhere to be found today is Texas Congressman Jeb Hensarling, who said, "If I were to sum up Todd Akin in a word, that would be 'principled.'  You can always rely on Todd to make that tough vote no matter who might be calling or what might be promised.  Count me 100% for Akin." And Jim Jordan (R-OH), who fancies himself the leader of the radical right in the House has always been a big Akin cheerleader: "Todd Akin is one of the conservative leaders you can count on to always do the right thing, even when under pressure from political leaders in either party.  He stands true to  his principles, and he has the commonsense approach that we need in the United States Senate."

Can Akin count on Jim Jordan today? Not so far, especially now that some more GOP House Members who are also Senate candidates (Jeff Flake and Rick Berg) denounced Akin's statement in no uncertain terms. Amazing there's no push-back from the zombie-right! We need to hear from Bachmann!

Although Hate Talk Radio host & religious fraud Bryan Fischer is defending Akin already, even far right politicians like Sen. Ron Johnson (R-WI) know that's a dead end:



Aken made up some nonsense about how "doctors" told him that women who get raped can't conceive. But he refuses to name the doctors. I suggested that they're Dr. Frankenstein, Dr. Jekyll, Dr. Evil and Dr. Coburn. But when a real doctor, David Gill, looked at his ridiculous claims, he was mortified:

As an ER doctor, I know that there is no basis for Akin’s offensive and extremely irresponsible claim. According to the National Institutes of Health, more than 30,000 pregnancies result from rape each year.

Too often, I have treated rape victims in the Emergency Room. These women suffer extreme emotional and physical trauma, and are often terrified by the added anguish of a possible unwanted pregnancy. There is nothing illegitimate about rape victims’ injuries. As a physician, it is my responsibility to stand up for these women and say “enough is enough.”

Akin’s offensive comments are part of the out of touch mentality we see in Congress. Washington politicians have tried to limit access to birth control this year-- even for married women. I will not stand by and allow this assault on women and their rights to continue.

In Congress, I pledge to be a voice of reason in an increasingly unreasonable debate. I will never back down from my belief that a woman’s body is hers and hers alone. I pledge never to allow outrageous claims like this to be reported as medical “fact” in an effort to deny a woman her rights.