It’s “The Bachmanns"! A Brand -New Show in a Brand-New Genre: Horror-Comedy!

by Noah

Please God! Make it stop? Nah! On second thought, it’s damn entertaining! If you thought The Palin Show was riveting car-crash great TV in 2008, just wait till the 2012 season really gets goin’! This ain’t no Donna Reed Show, or Father Knows Best, and there’s certainly a hell of a lot more kids than The Brady Bunch!

I don’t know about separate bedrooms, although certain aspersions have been cast, but in the Bachmann mansion there are many closets! Previously, we heard about Michele Bachmann’s very real love of socialism as expressed in her happily accepting government welfare, to the tune of hundreds of thousands of dollars in subsidies, all the while publicly decrying such things as the definition of evil as bad, bad, nasty, bad socialism. That’s quite a skeleton in the closet. But wait, there’s more!

Rep. Bachmann’s hubby, Dr. Marcus Bachmann, a clinical therapist and “Christian counselor” who specializes in so-called pro-life, pro-family, pro-marriage, and cure-“the gay”-with-the-Bible matters, and also gets a sizable chunk of that evil, bad, bad, nasty, bad government welfare for support of his clinic, has been heard from, in the form of a rabidly homophobic quote from a May 10, 2010, broadcast on a Christonut radio show called Point of View.

News of the quote has been circulating around for a bit, but it really burst forward on a bigger stage just recently.

Point of View claims that its place in the universe is to “proclaim Christian solutions for the problems of America” and “restore the greatness of Christian thought and values to every area of American Life.” If that sounds to you more than a little like a statement from the local Taliban, if you just substitute the word "Islamic" for "Christian," or someone pushing for us to adopt their own Sharia law, then read on and see how Marcus Bachmann refers to gay people:

We have to understand: Barbarians need to be educated. They need to be disciplined. Just because someone feels it or thinks it doesn’t mean that we are supposed to go down that road. That’s what is called the sinful nature.

This is one tightly wound family! When that spring snaps, it’s gonna be a helluva show! Barbarians? No doubt Michele Bachmann’s followers, and Republicans in general, will just eat this stuff up. The word "discipline" alone, used in any context, has always raised their antenna and caused much excitement in the Repug community. Couple it with words like "sinful" and they practically go into a state of orgasmic rapture.

But it just gets better as Bachmann's mister works up a frenzied froth of blame and heaps it upon our public education system for an imaginary rampant increase in homosexual behavior.

And let’s face it: What is our culture, what is our public education system doing today? They are giving full, wide-open doors to children, not only giving encouragement to think it but to encourage action steps. That’s why when we understand what truly is the percentage of homosexuals in this country, it is small. But by these open doors, I can see and we are experiencing, that it is starting to increase.

Well, yes. Someone needs to face something, but that someone is not us -- unless we’re talking about facing the fact that there is yet another would-be Jerry Falwell that’s been lurking in the park bushes out there, ready to blame the next terror attack or hurricane or wildfire on what he sees as an overly permissive society. Someone sounds like he’s barely keeping the lid on the jar and the cheese on his cracker!

And here we thought the wifey was the crazy one in the family. Little did we know that she had an even crazier hubby locked up in the attic. Think about this: These two very disturbed people were allowed to adopt over 20 kids and bring them into their home asylum. Think about the children! Talk about indoctrination! Christian schools for everyone! Discipline the gays! Reprogramming! Home schooling legislation! Onward Christian soldiers, marching off to war in a town near you, very near!

It’s pretty damn bad when anyone views being gay as a "problem of America." It can be argued that it's also pretty damn bad when someone can hang out their shingle and proclaim themselves some kind of "Christian counselor," using the Bible to address such "problems," and do it while being supported with money from the dreaded big bad government. That's our taxpayer dollars, folks. It also might make a helluva nice separation of church and state case, but who's gonna go there? Certainly not our joke of a banana republic legal system.

Lest you think that Marcus Bachmann would be a silent First Husband if the woman who wears the pants actually got elected, fear not! No less a figure than former Minnesota Republican Party Chairman Ron Carey refers to Marcus Bachmann as part of her "brain trust." (As Howie's post earlier this morning pointed out via Matt Taibbi, it was Marcus who ordained that Michele do graduate work in tax law, even though she hates taxes.) This may explain some of "the crazy." But I think we may be about to learn a lot more about why Michele Bachmann is so angry and fearful all the time, and it may not just be about that lesbian stepsister of hers.

We may be hearing more than we really want to or need to know, and soon. But hey, she married the guy and she wanted the spotlight. I guess she gave him an offer he dared not refuse.


Somewhere over the rainbow: On-screen comment about "Christian counselor" Marcus B: "He's 3 seconds away from bursting into a Judy Garland impression."

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