Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Texas Crackpot Louie Gohmert Wants Christian Zombies To Take Over America So "God Has Something To Smile About"

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Yesterday Christine O'Donnell (R-DE) three-time GOP Senate nominee-- and widely acknowledged nincompoop who even Karl Rove said was insupportable-- insisted the Constitution (the U.S. one) doesn't provide for a clause separating Church and State. At a law school debate with Chris Coons she demanded to know "Where in the Constitution is the separation of church and state?" Hanging around teabagger/faux Constitutionalists it's understandable why she might not be aware of one of the most important achievements of the Founding Fathers. Presumably, the laughter of the students has now made her aware of her own preposterous and abject lack of knowledge. An astonished Coons quoted the relevant part of the First Amendment to her: "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof." Another one for the teabaggers to try to eliminate!



You can barely blame a dim bulb and former professional Bill Maher guest like O'Donnell, who has apparently spent more time learning witchcraft than studying the Constitution she professes so much love for. After all, look at the company she keeps! Also yesterday, Texas extremist Louie Gohmert (R-TX) popped out of his garbage can again for moment to shriek some incoherent screed of the American Taliban:
You are God’s minister to punish evil and reward good conduct. But, too many Christians have refused the figurative “sword” or the power that in this great country, this little experiment in democracy as a republic, is supposed to be held by YOU. You are the one God has ordained to run the country, but you haven’t even participated ... That is also why we have penalties for societal good things like marriage (the income tax “marriage penalty”) and for 45 years we have rewarded having children out of wedlock instead of helping incentivise such women to finish their education. It is why we have a death tax that says you were too successful so we must take 55% away and give to the government. It is why people have in the past been threatened with removal from low-rent government housing for saving too much money for a down payment on a home. We punish good behavior too often and reward potentially hurtful conduct. It is also why we passed a Wall Street bailout to reward uncontrolled and irresponsible greed. It is also why TARP has not already been repealed, since it would mean admitting that maybe those who voted for it, including Republican leaders, had made a mistake.

"It is high time," goofy Gohmert scolded his Amen choir, "that we gave God something to smile about again." God already is smiling! After all, a once profitable satanic coven in Orange County, disguised as His House, just went bankrupt. YES... the Crystal Cathedral filed for bankruptcy in order to avoid paying its debts. Hundreds of creditors could be owed between $50 million and $100 million, according to documents filed in U.S. Bankruptcy Court in Santa Ana on Monday.
The church was started by the Rev. Robert H. Schuller in a rented drive-in movie theater in 1955 and came to prominence through the "Hour of Power" television show. But in January, faced with a $55-million budget deficit and a 27% drop in revenue over the last two years, it eliminated some of its signature offerings and sold property.

The church slashed dozens of jobs, pulled the "Hour of Power" from seven stations and canceled its annual Christmas and Easter pageants, which drew thousands of people.

I've never been to the Garden Grove megachurch, which isn't really a cathedral, just a business venture selling a bunch of religionist mumbo-jumbo to the suckers. But that's not to say I've never had any run-ins with them. I want to pull away from writing about politics for 10 minutes to recount a story from the not too distant past.

I had just retired as president of Reprise Records and a wealthy friend asked me if I'd like to serve on a board of directors. I explained that I was already on the board of a public service and civil liberties organization. He laughed and explained that instead of working my ass off and paying to be on the board of a do-good group like the one I'm on, he could get me on a board that would pay me hundreds of thousands of dollars to just nod and grunt. I'm good at that so I said ok. About a week later I got a call from someone looking to place someone on the board of McDonald's. I was repulsed by the idea and explained why. They never called me back. But my friend decided he needed to talk with me about my bad attitude.

He called a few days later and said he was flying to Vegas on his private jet in 2 hours and asked me to come along. I like him and I know he meant well with the McDonald's thing and maybe I had forgotten to tell him that I'm a raw vegan. So I drove down to where he parks his plane and we went to Vegas to see some band play that he was involved with. There were two other guys on the flight, one of whom is also a good friend of mine and one, who I had never met, a good friend of my host's. The other guy-- let me call him George-- had the most offensive, foul mouth I had ever heard. The entire hour we spent flying to Vegas was a repulsive nonstop barrage of what he planned to do to women who fell into his clutches in Las Vegas. He wasn't quite as bad as the Allen West (R-FL) supporters who routinely refer to women as oral relief stations... but almost. And he was, proudly, a deacon at Crystal Cathedral. He bragged and bragged about how he's able to use his position to seduce other men's wives. That's his business; what pissed me off was all the chatter about body parts and lewd acts.

Once we arrived at the hotel I was determined to avoid seeing George again. But he waylaid me and insisted I go with him to a whorehouse, the other two guys being married and uninterested. "I'm gay," I shouted as loudly as I could (in the casino), "and I guarantee you, I'm less interested than they are!" He literally tackled me and dragged me down to the floor to get me to pray with him for my soul. I pushed him away and told him what I thought about him and asked him to not come near me for the rest of the trip. He babbled the entire time about saving my soul. I hope he and Christine O'Donnell and Louie Gohmert all find some kind of salvation at some point and stop making other peoples' lives miserable.

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3 Comments:

At 11:42 AM, Anonymous mediabob said...

Howie, I've long felt the business of religion is at odds with its clients and the religious leaders dislike their clients.

 
At 3:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great story, Howie.

 
At 2:20 AM, Anonymous Sam said...

How funny. The constitution is a living document whenever lines need to be added or deleted to fit conservative aims, but otherwise is not a living document...

 

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