Ring Lardner Tonight: Bed-Time Stories -- "Cinderella"

Okay, this isn't exactly Disney's Cinderella we have tonight, but try to imagine Ring's Zelda . . . er, Cinderella with her Fairy Godmother, "a bit of an old dame" who with her magic wand could turn "a rat from the rat trap" into "a big city chauffeur" (to drive the "big, black touring car like murderers rides in") -- though this particular feat "wasn't hardly any trouble."

"Listen," says Cinderella: "don't mention mother to me! I've tried two different kinds and they've both been a flop!"

"Yes, but listen yourself," says the godmother: "wouldn't you like to go to this here dance?"

"Who and the h--l wouldn't!" says Cinderella.

"Well, then," says the godmother, "go out in the garden and pick me a pumpkin."

"You're pie-eyed," was Cinderella's criticism . . .

-- from Ring Lardner's version of "Cinderella"

by Ken

Who and the h--l wouldn't indeed, Cinderella!

Now where were we before we were so rudely interrupted? I don't think it's just my imagination that "Cinderella" had already been safely posted Wednesday night, following our first Lardner "Bed-Time Story," "How to Tell a True Princess," before our bloghost went on its impromptu hiatus yesterday. But when it returned, there was no trace of "Cinderella" -- except (and thank goodness for this much!) a raw draft version of the tale itself.

So for tonight I've reconstituted the "Cinderella" post, and then Sunday night we'll finish up our Ring Lardner "Bed-Time Stories" with "Red Riding Hood," before moving onto a new Lardner project that I have to say fills me with foreboding and dread. (More about that when the time comes.)


FOR RING'S VERSION OF "CINDERELLA," CLICK HERE.


TOMORROW NIGHT we'll have a single Sunday Classics preview, and then Sunday in RING LARDNER TONIGHT, as I mentioned, we'll have the Master's retelling of "Red Riding Hood," with another Lardner project launching Monday night


THURBER TONIGHT (including BENCHLEY, WILL CUPPY, WOLCOTT GIBBS, RING LARDNER, BOB AND RAY, E. B. WHITE, and JEAN SHEPHERD TONIGHT): Check out the series to date

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