Pour yourself a cup of tea, and get ready for . . . the Sarah Palin Network!

"Not all our programming is fear-based."

You're not gonna wanna miss Alaskanence, the show about "a single woman who doesn't believe in having sex before marriage who is struggling to raise her three young children," or So You Think You Can Make Me Fill Out the Census, or the 30 Rock parody 30 Main Street, in which the princess herself stars as Lez Lemons, "an uppity bitch who's so focused on her career that she's in her late 30s and stil doesn't have grandchildren" (it's even got its own Baldwin brother -- Stephen, of course). -- Ken