Newt, You Dirty, Dirty Dog!

By NOAH
 
This week, Newt Gingrich, the man who once sought to impeach his way into the White House, awarded one of his “Entrepreneur of The Year” awards to Pink Visual, a porn DVD superstore, but after being discovered, has pulled out of all consummation activities.
 
Pink Visual’s Allison Vivas, was notified, by fax, of the award by Gingrich’s American Solutions for Winning the Future (ASWF) organization. She was informed that she’d been chosen for a 2009 Entrepreneur of the Year award by Gingrich’s Business Defense and Advisory Council. Think Progress has obtained a copy of the notification.
 
               Private Rooms Available!

“Newt would like to arrange a PRIVATE (Oooh la la!) dinner with you at the historic Capitol Hill Club on the evening of October 7, 2009 in Washington. You’ll dine privately with Newt at this exclusive (No Jews? No blacks? No doubt?) club and he’ll take the occasion to present you with your well deserved (“You’ve been a very good girl.”) award and have your photo taken together.” (“Get away, you creepy man!”)
                                          
             Size Matters
 
“This tremendous honor is a testament to your success in building your business and recognition of the risks you take to create jobs and STIMULATE the economy. As an award winner, you’ll be on the ground floor… Newt is looking forward to hearing your ideas on getting the economy moving again and getting your feedback on his plans over dinner.”

There you have it. The economy is so bad, that for many, porn is the only way out. ThinkProgress contacted Gingrich aide Joe Gaylord (An obvious screen name if there ever was one!) but found him UNRESPONSIVE. ASWF has reportedly called Pink Visual with the premature withdraw news, saying that the award was “inadvertent.”

Pink Visual’s marketing coordinator Q Boyer isn’t buying it any more than any rational person would:
 
                        Inquiring Minds Want To Know

“Allison was disappointed to receive a call this morning from an ASWF representative… We’re not entirely clear on how one ‘inadvertently’ sends a fax to the right person at the correct fax number, so our sense is that this is damage control on the part of a group that is having second thoughts…”
 
Ironically, Gingrich led a 1995 press conference to announce the Christian Coalition’s 10-point “Contract With The American Family.” One of the 10 points called for a restriction on porn. I’m assuming that there were exemptions for people such as the porn again reverend Jimmy Swaggart who was once pulled over with a hooker and a big pile o’ porn in the car. I am also curious about how Gingrich’s outfit judges companies. What is the basis on which one is given an award? Who examines the products? Is there a David Vitter Golden Diaper Award?

ThinkProgress also reports that listed on the PRIVATE DINNER agenda is time for VIDEO presentations (Say no more!). In the fax sent to Vivas, Gaylord circled the video mention and added the note:
 
“Please come prepared to share your thoughts on how we can help your business.” (Nudge, nudge, Wink. Wink!)

                  Bad, Naughty Boys. Nasty Bad Naughty Boys.

I don’t know about you, but I might be pretty creeped out by the thought of Newt Gingrich watching his secret porn collection for a very long time. Clarence Thomas’s box set of Long Dong Silver videos and the rumored circumstances around the resignation of Newt’s successor, Rep. Bob Livingston was bad enough.