Up in the sky, is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's Young Johnny "Impulseman" McCranky about to swoop down and spread more lies and confusion

(Thanks to Patriotboy and his superhero, Jesus' General)

by Ken

Logic says that after the insanity and inanity of the last couple of weeks, coupled with the vengeful turn that reality has taken against God's own POW, the McCranky presidential campaign -- the sleaziest, stupidest, vilest, most dishonest and incompetent national political campaign I can recall -- should be D-E-A-D, dead, with no support from anyone except the 30 percent or so of the American electorate that has chosen to live its life as screeching lunatics, beyond the reach of even the tiniest shred of decency or sense.

But a voice inside me keeps saying, "The lying sack of dung is going to get away with it and come out the crusading hero of the common man -- and his wholly owned chattel, the common woman."

Just look at this week. This man who has spent his entire political career fellating the rich and powerful, helping them turn the U.S. into a country of the rich, by the rich, and for the rich, crusading against all governmental interference with their right to do whatever they damned please, has the gall to try to pass himself off -- the very moment some of the generation's worth of accumulating fecal matter starts attacking the fan -- as an "outsider" who's going to clean up these decades' worth of D.C. and Wall Street filth.

When even the lickspittle Infotainment News Media decide that this is more lying than they can put up with and poke tentatively at his more preposterous claims, he puts on yet another mask, dons a cape, and transforms himself into a cartoon superhero, supposedly suspending his campaign (a total crock -- it was just a stunt to deflect some of the harsh glare of reality from that shellshocked campaign) so that he can swoop down on Washington, where he hasn't participated in any substantive business in a good year and a half, with the stated goal of hammering out a "solution."

Of course he not only has no clue as to what the problem is, he doesn't deign to trouble his precious head even with the effort to read the three pages that constitute the "plan" -- a plan that really isn't a plan, just an appropriation of absolute power -- being forced on the country by the Bush regime by means of its favorite strategy, mongering terror.

As an unintentional happy result, the Masked McCranky appears to have at least delayed if not actually prevented the ramming through of some lightly embellished version of this Paulson "plan." (Lipstick on a pig, anyone?) Of course he did it at the price of empowering a coterie of House loons under the care of Pack Leader John "I'm Tanning As Fast As I Can" Boehner, people who are even nuttier and farther out of touch with reality than the Wall Street stooges of the Bush regime.

As we're so often reminded, Young Johnny McCranky has admitted, in fleeting moments of the candor for which he is undeservedly famous, that he doesn't understand economics or the workings of the economy or our financial institutions. Which doesn't seem to faze him as he tries to ram himself down the country's throat as our next president.

The closer we look at the McCranky career, without even factoring in what are looking like ravaging diminutions in his capacities owing to age and health, the clearer it is that he really has no political beliefs beyond some kind of knee-jerk cowboy anti-Communism. I know we've just about run out of Communists. Well, tough! That just means we have to press any available supervillains into service -- bad guys on whom the Crankyman is prepared to unleash whatever weapons people are foolish enough to put at his demented disposal.

Beyond that, he appears to have no interests beyond his own personal aggrandizement, which in his deep-rooted mental confusion -- and again, I'm talking about a mental deformation that precedes by decades any effects of aging -- he appears to identify with his own loony impulses. This is, as our friend Cliff Schecter put it so aptly,The Real McCain, and I consider it shockingly irresponsible for any news reporter or commentator to speak publicly about Young Johnny without having digested Cliff's book.

Wild impulses erupt in Impulseman's brain, and he appears powerless to control them. Instead, he flaunts them. And tragically, there is a segment of the American electorate who seem to identify certain types of sociopaths as "one of us." These would be the people who fell in love at first demented rant with Sarah Palin, who announced herself in no uncertain terms as a bullying, vitriolilc, thuggish nincompoop, and as soon as there was time to check even superficially was revealed to be an ideologically deranged religious extremist and a compulsive liar. Just as with her partner in slime McCranky, it's hard to find a word she has said or a deed she has done that isn't based on outright fabrication or delusion.

And still that nagging voice inside me says, "With voters who demand to be lied to and abused, never bet against an abusive, lying scumbag."

#