History? Get me rewrite! Does it count for anything that bizwhores like Colorado's Bob "Man of Much Wind" Schaffer have developed a bit of shame?

We bring you another touching vignette from the impossibly overworked (election year, you know) DWT You Can't Make This Stuff Up Department.

Over at ProgressNowAction, Alan Franklin is asking whether Bob Schaffer, the Republican candidate for the Senate seat being vacated by Colorado superslug Wayne Allard "is lying on his bio again?" [Note: For a stirring note about our Wayne, one that's all but guaranteed to put a lump in your throat, or somewhere, see below.]

It seems that the bio of our Bob posted on the website of the employer he left on December 31 to make his Senate run, CHx Capital, LLC / Aspect Energy, LLC, has mysteriously changed. "A few months ago," Alan explains, "we took a routine screenshot of Senate candidate Bob Schaffer's biography web page at his former employer's site, Aspect Energy. Here's what it said."

Bob Schaffer

CHx Capital - Vice President Emeritus

Bob Schaffer is Vice President for business development at CHx Capital, LLC where he is involved with a variety of energy, mining and education projects. Additionally, Bob is actively involved in international business development activities for Aspect Energy, including sourcing and development of international oil and gas exploration opportunities for the Company. In 2007, Bob Schaffer provided notice to Aspect and CHx of his intention to run for the United States Senate. Bob Schaffer resigned his position with CHx Capital, LLC / Aspect Energy, LLC effective December 21, 2007. We wish him the best of luck and offer him our congratulations for his contributions to energy and wind development efforts.

"Sounds about right, doesn't it?" Alan says. "I mean he doesn't come right out and say 'he led Aspect's delegation to Iraq in search of oil development contracts,' but it doesn't seem at first glance like he's hiding anything. Unless you read the bio they replaced it with a few weeks ago:"

Bob Schaffer

CHx Capital - Vice-president Emeritus

Bob Schaffer previously acted as Vice-President for business development at CHx Capital, LLC. Bob was involved in a variety of wind power investments, international energy opportunities, and education projects. Bob worked to improve the US Wind Industry. Specifically, he worked to increase entrepreneurial opportunities for small business owners by ensuring that wind-specific tax credits could be utilized indirectly by wind developers classified as small business owners. Bob helped educate Congress about the benefits of wind power including its positive impact on the environment, job creation, and its importance to making the United States less dependent on foreign sources of oil. In 2007, Bob Schaffer provided notice to Aspect and CHx of his intention to run for the United States Senate. Bob Schaffer resigned his position with CHx Capital, LLC / Aspect Energy, LLC effective December 31, 2007. We wish him the best of luck and offer him our congratulations for his contributions to energy and wind development efforts.

Um, uh, say what? Our Bob is suddenly the wind-energy guy?

Here's Alan's take:

Amazing how quickly you can go from Aspect Energy's point man for "sourcing and development of international oil and gas exploration opportunities" to helping "educate Congress about the benefits of wind power including its positive impact on the environment, job creation, and its importance to making the United States less dependent on foreign sources of oil," don't you think? Were precautions against whiplash necessary?

From everything we hear, the Schaffer campaign appears to be a carnvial of banana peels, with the candidate slipping and sliding hopelessly. All the more reason to get behind the strong Democratic Senate candidate, Mark Udall.

(In case you have as much trouble as I do keeping track of all those Udalls, Colorado's Rep. Mark U is the son of the late 15-term Arizona Rep. Mo Udall, one of the most beloved figures in modern American politics. Mark's cousin Rep. Tom U, currently running for the New Mexico Senate seat being vacated--and not a moment too soon--by sad old Pete Domenici, is the son of another highly regarded public servant, Mo's older brother Stewart U, who served as secretary of the interior for the full eight years of the presidencies of John F. Kennedy and Lyndon B. Johnson.)


NOW FOR THAT WORD ABOUT WAYNE ALLARD, MAN OF PRINCIPLE

To call retiring Colorado Sen. Wayne Allard "undistinguished" would be an understatement, or maybe an overstatement, considering how little there is to talk about. But just today our Wayne sounded a sentimental note. Howie of course has kept us up to date on the rousing triumph today of the incorporation of Virginia Sen. Jim Webb's long-overdue revamping of the GI Bill -- providing benefits to U.S. military veterans which most Americans probably thought they were already getting -- into the Iraq military appropriations bill.

The final 75-22 tally makes it sound like the bill was a shoo-in, when it was anything but. As we all know, thanks to the Senate "leadership" of Doctorbill "I'm a Whore for For-Profit Healthcare" Frist and Mitch "Show Me the Money" McConnell, two of the lowest life forms to slither the planet, you now need 60 votes to do pretty much anything in the Senate, and while it was thought that the 60 votes would be there for the Webb initiative, that assumed no slippage among the Blue Dog Democrats or among the hardy band of Republicans trying their hand at, for once, not being Bush-regime rubber stamps--on a vote that would have had them voting squarely against "supporting our troops."

As Howie already reported, once it became clear that the 60 votes were there, something of a stampede took place, among senators who--all but after the fact--decided that it would be better to go on record as supporting rather than spitting on the troops. I'm not sure that we have a definitive rendering of which Republican "yea" votes were which, but in general the Republican votes for the Webb initiative fell into two groups: incumbents facing reelection in this dangerous-for-Republicans election year, and Republicans who are retiring.

About this latter group, our colleague Marcy Wheeler observed just as the vote tallies were being made known, that all the Republican retirees save one voted the sensible way, suggesting that impending retirement had had a salutary effect on the clarity of their moral judgment.

And the exception? You got it: Wayne Allard! Whatta guy! One who doesn't let his sense of rightness be affected by petty electoral considerations. Not our Wayne. As a pol, a useless void of a human being, not just when the klieg lights are shining on him, but who to the bitter end can look at our military veterans and the sacrifices they make for their country and say to them:

"Screw you!"

Yessir, meet Wayne Allard, Man of Principle.

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