Friday, January 25, 2008

THE. MOST. BORING. AND. SENSELESS. DEBATE. EVER. PARTY OF IDEAS? I DON'T THINK SO

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If Florida Republicans needed another reason to stay away from the polls next week, they found it on MSNBC tonight: the political snooze-fest of the year. Big loser: Giuliani. He had the most to lose if nothing happened. Nothing happened. NOTHING. This was like one of those early Andy Warhol movies like Kiss or Sleep, or, more appropriately, Empire.

So what did we learn-- those of us who stayed awake through this march of the pathetic pygmies? Well, first and foremost, they are willing to tell the American public that they want to abolish taxes. Are even Republicans still that gullible? Everyone was on good behavior, although Willard can't help himself and had to try to stick a shiv in McCain's back when he thought no one was paying attention-- "he voted against the Bush tax cuts." [Though maybe you can't directly blame Willard for being a dick. Maybe it was that little voice in his ear.] I loved that all the candidates agreed that Ted Stevens and Don Young were the personification of much of what is wrong with the Republican Party and with the Inside the Beltway Establishment. How many times did we hear "Bridge to Nowhere?"

I had to laugh when the pygmies were asked what they thought of a just released poll that asks a broad and representative segment of the American public which party they trust to handle the economy and people overwhelmingly chose the Democrats-- by 18%. The only answer seemed to be that they would lower taxes, hate China, do everything different from Bush and veto the Bridge to Nowhere.

Oh and they hate Hillary and her evil twin Rumsfeld-- and taxes. And-- who knew-- there were weapons of mass destruction and that's why we must stay in Iraq. The NY Times editorial endorsing McCain and slamming Giuliani was much more interesting. The editors start by voicing what the vast majority of Americans feel about the pygmies: "We have strong disagreements with all the Republicans running for president. The leading candidates have no plan for getting American troops out of Iraq. They are too wedded to discredited economic theories and unwilling even now to break with the legacy of President Bush. We disagree with them strongly on what makes a good Supreme Court justice." That said, they held their noses and picked McCain who they seem to feel is less venal that Bush. Doesn't take much. Then they explained why they didn't endorse the candidate they know best.
The real Mr. Giuliani, whom many New Yorkers came to know and mistrust, is a narrow, obsessively secretive, vindictive man who saw no need to limit police power. Racial polarization was as much a legacy of his tenure as the rebirth of Times Square.

Mr. Giuliani’s arrogance and bad judgment are breathtaking. When he claims fiscal prudence, we remember how he ran through surpluses without a thought to the inevitable downturn and bequeathed huge deficits to his successor. He fired Police Commissioner William Bratton, the architect of the drop in crime, because he couldn’t share the limelight. He later gave the job to Bernard Kerik, who has now been indicted on fraud and corruption charges.

The Rudolph Giuliani of 2008 first shamelessly turned the horror of 9/11 into a lucrative business, with a secret client list, then exploited his city’s and the country’s nightmare to promote his presidential campaign
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The other candidates offer no better choices.

Mitt Romney’s shape-shifting rivals that of Mr. Giuliani. It is hard to find an issue on which he has not repositioned himself to the right since he was governor of Massachusetts. It is impossible to figure out where he stands or where he would lead the country.

So much more exciting and informative than that dull, dull debate in Boca Raton. Even the wingnuts thought the debate was pathetic. One Republican wag asked "Where can I go to get my 90 minutes back? " Another low level GOP propagandist rated it a D and then said a D is too generous. "Conservative voters in Florida are the big losers. This debate gave them nothing."

Meanwhile conservative voters next door in Georgia want to broaden the horse-race out a bit and are ready to hand The Huckster a big victory. According to the latest Rasmussen poll Huck's gonna win the GOP primary there by a wide margin (thanks to Frederick of Hollywood's departure. And Ron Paul beats Giuliani. Brokered convention.


UPDATE: VICIOUS, SLIMY WILLARD

Behind Willard's fake smile and shiny teeth, he's always planning how to stab his opponent in the back-- not that McCain doesn't deserve to be attacked. Willard ought to do it mano a mano. Instead he does it with expensive TV ads, like this one:

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7 Comments:

At 8:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

And when was the last time anyone from the Democratic Party offered an idea that did't 1) involve bigger government, 2) higher taxes, 3) undermine our freedoms, or 4) destroy our traditional values? It would seem to me that the Republican party is the party of bad ideas and the Democratic party is the party of no new ideas.

 
At 9:15 AM, Anonymous me said...

"It is impossible to figure out where he stands or where he would lead the country."

I think they're wrong about that. I am convinced that the real Romney is the one who's speaking now, the one who's anti-abortion, the one who wants to "double Guantanamo".

That other, softer Romney was a bullshitter who was trying to get elected in Massachusetts. He's not lying now; he was lying then.

 
At 9:25 AM, Anonymous me said...

To anon: Repubs, especially Reagan and Bush, have expanded the size of government, especially the military, by HUGE amounts, far more than any Democrat has. Those two also borrowed far more money than all other presidents of either party put together. And you still buy that bullshit line about Dems being the party of "big government"? Get off that kool-aid! It's rotting your brain.

Higher taxes? We NEED higher taxes! Our country is going broke, and rich bastards are not paying their fair share! Repubs' anti-tax (on the rich) mania is driving us into the poorhouse!

"Undermine our freedoms"?? Are you nuts??? It wasn't the Dems who pushed the Unpatriot Act, or who abolished habeus corpus, although I'll admit they were traitorous enough to go along with it.

Our "traditional values"? FUCK those so-called traditional values! That's just another code word for conservative christian theocrats taking over the government.

You right-wing assholes have fucked things up for decades in this country. And look at the result! Everything is going to hell. Time for idiot jerks like you to sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up, and let somebody competent run things for a change.

 
At 9:38 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Last thing we need are a bunch of fucking commies running everything! FUCK higher taxes. The rich already DO pay their fair share...Congress doensn't know how to stop spending like drunken sailors. As for the Patriot Act, seems to me that there was bi-partisan support on that one...Dems and GOP alike are complicit on that one! As for compitency...when was the last time socialism or communism actually worked in the world? Big government isn't going to solve shit....it's just going to destoy what's left of society! So to hell with you and you Godless, heathon, "me first," baby-killing, tree-hugging, society-destroying commie-liberals!

 
At 10:00 AM, Anonymous me said...

Just like a right-wing asshole to label non-right-wing-assholes "communists".

Your way has been tried, and IT DOESN'T WORK. All it does is make things worse. Time after time, every time.

Take your christian tongue out of Bush's asshole long enough to breathe once and a while. And fuck you!

 
At 10:02 AM, Anonymous me said...

PS. Why oh why is it that CONSERVATIVES CAN'T SPELL?

I think it is because THEY ARE FUCKING STUPID!!!!

 
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