LINDSEY GRAHAM, BACK FROM IRAQ, IS ALL MIXED UP AND CONFUSED

A confused Lindsey Graham wants to save democracy by destroying it

Maybe he's distraught because he didn't find any bargains on his latest carpet-buying trip to Iraq or because a crazy right-wing extremist dentist is running a nasty campaign against him back home, but South Carolina rubber stamp Senator Lindsey Graham is back from his latest trip to Baghdad-- and speaking from both sides of his mouth. On the one hand, he and Saxby Chamberpot (R-GA) were threatening Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki that unless his government starts making some progress by... pick a date (they picked... January), the U.S. should consider pulling political or financial support for his government. On the other hand, he praised Bush's brilliant policy agenda in Iraq, an agenda he has been a major backer of, to the skies and waxed enthusiastic about how well everything is going in that wonderful country.

In a display of how Republicans understand the concept of "democracy" we're supposedly fighting for in Iraq, Senators Chamberpot and Graham each threatened the Iraqi prime minister's job.

"I do expect them to deliver," Graham, R-S.C., said in a phone interview upon returning from a Thanksgiving trip to Iraq. "What would happen for me if there's no progress on reconciliation after the first of the year, I would be looking at ways to invest our money into groups that can deliver."

Chambliss, R-Ga., who traveled with Graham as part of a larger congressional delegation, said lawmakers might even call for al-Maliki's ouster if Baghdad didn't reach agreement on at least some of the major issues seen as key to tamping down sectarian violence.

"If we don't see positive results by the end of the year I think you'll probably see a strong message coming out of Congress calling for a change in administration," he said in a conference call with reporters.

Also along for the ride were probably future defendents in war crimes tribunals Joe Lieberman and John McCain. Graham was on Fox yesterday babbling about how fabulous everything is in Iraq, "beyond my expectations. I think history will judge the surge as probably the most successful counterinsurgency military operation in history." Only time will tell if South Carolina's confused senator is an accurate oracle of historical judgments, but right now far more militarily knowledgable Americans than Graham will ever be are criticizing his and Bush's war. And next November Americans will render their own judgment at the polls, a judgment unlikely to be in sync with Graham's airy fairy, albeit misleading, cheerleading.