WEBB LETS GEORGE FELIX ALLEN KNOW THAT HIS ROLE IN VA SENATE RACE IS TO BE A PUNCHING BAG AND LAUGHING STOCK

I have to admit that I haven't been a huge James Webb fan. From day one I was a little apprehensive that, although he could beat George Allen, one of the absolutely worst senators anywhere in America, we could be creating the next Lieberman or Zell Miller by backing Webb. And then that primary campaign was so vicious and repulsive that I just plain turned the whole race off from my consciousness.

But I guess, at heart, I'm a cheap whore because Webb sure was my hero yesterday! The Associated Press reported that Webb knows how to answer the kinds of vile rightist slurs that is all they have in their little Rovian bags of filth. One would hope John Kerry would learn something about how to respond when one of these panty-wasted little pussies questions your patriotism-- especially when it comes from dog poop, like George Bush or George Allen that you just need to wipe off your shoes.

When Allen launched into an ignorant and pompous attack on Webb's opposition to the idiotioc flag-burning amendment that the Senate has been wasting time on lately instead of dealing with real problems the country is facing, Webb hit back-- fast and hard and Allen went and hid under his bed and shut his face. And all Webb, a much decorated war hero (and Ronald Reagan's former Secretary of the Navy), did was remind Virgnians that "Allen [is] a coward who sat out the Vietnam War 'playing cowboy at a dude ranch in Nevada.'"

One of Webb's senior aides tweaked Allen by continually using his much-hated middle name (which kids in elementary school used to call him when they would beat him up everyday, which is what made him turn to right-wing notions and, eventually, the Republican Party), "While Jim Webb and others of George Felix Allen Jr.'s generation were fighting for our freedoms and for our symbols of freedom in Vietnam, George Felix Allen Jr. was playing cowboy at a dude ranch in Nevada."

Referring to Allen's laughable press release as "weak-kneed attacks by cowards," Webb's aide reminded Felix that "people who live in glass dude ranches should not question the patriotism of real soldiers who fought and bled for this country on a real battlefield."

Wow! I bet Allen, who is best known for dealing with his profound feelings of inadequacy by beating up and torturing his sister-- who wrote a book about what a pathetic psychopath he is-- wishes he was never born. (You hadn't heard about the Virginia Senator who would be president who was already showing signs of psychopathic sadism when he was just a monstrous little punk? Perhaps you need to read his younger sister's book, FIFTH QUARTER: THE SCRIMMAGE OF A FOOTBALL COACH'S DAUGHTER. In it George Felix's younger sister Jennifer, exposes him as a sadist who routinely attacked his younger siblings, once dangling her over Niagara Falls by the feet, beating her boyfriend over the head with a pool cue, throwing their younger brother Brice through a glass door, dragging the children around the house by their hair, etc. "George hoped someday to become a dentist," she wrote. "George said he saw dentistry as a perfect profession-- getting paid to make people suffer."