ORDINARY PEOPLE

My sister in law’s….errr…..errr….. neighbor’s cousin’s mother’s friend (crap, they will still know it is me if they read this) told me yesterday they had quit their church. They have been blissfully saved and are now Christianized some 10 years or so. Now, they are going to another church started by the original pastor of the church they just quit, the pastor who goes around starting churches around the area….like we don’t have enough. I know they like this pastor, what he sees in them besides tithes, I don’t know, but it must be one of those mysterious God things. Anyway, she went on to explain to me that the church they used to attend now just has too many politics going on. “Well, I said, it is typical of institutions of any size….even churches…..” The look she flashed me was untrusting. Seems she still believes churches ought to be above that sort of thing.

The church they are leaving has grown to considerable size. As churches go, they do some good things here in this community. They distribute food one or two Tuesdays a month to anyone willing to get in line. The building is huge, and to their credit is built of fabric and not concrete….the fabric was cheaper. But, I happen to know the pastors there have had serious problems, and of course I know my husband’s family pretty well (Okay, so no one show this to my sister in law, okay?). There are lots of secrets and there is plenty of not so Christ-like behavior. That doesn’t bother me. I know people are just people, but no one has told the fundies yet, even though they claim to know it.

Growing up as a bible thumping holy rolling fundamentalist, myself, I had an interesting childhood. I was always afraid I was going to see Jesus or the Devil appear to me, and the prospect of either frightened me equally. I watched my mother throw away all of her nonconforming clothing….sleeveless blouses, slacks of any kind and jewelry when she joined the Nazarene church. I dug through the trash and pulled out the jewelry from her childhood, the charm bracelet and the Indian beads (at least that is what she told me they were). These items meant something to me because I, just as many a child, loved to muck around in my mothers jewelry box and ask the stories of the pieces there. I might have a couple of things still, but over time, not even I could save our past.

Over the years, until I was around 40ish, I traveled the religious pathway of the right, until I studied my way out of organized religion, any religion. I understand them….those lovable whacky right wingers. I do not claim to understand all the leaders, but some of the lower level ones, I can easily explain. I wanted to be a traveling revivalist for a good deal of my life. I love public speaking and writing and lesson teaching. I am glad I did not become an evangelist. I certainly would have lost my soul.

Christians are only trying to do the two things that Elliot Aronson claims that human beings do. They are trying to believe they are good and that they are smart. It is pretty simple really. You can sound very smart and authoritative when claiming to hear from God. And really how much better does good get than, God is good? I see it all the time. And, let us add one more feature to this “godliness:” it is a team sport. You are to go out there and win converts! Goodie, goodie! Score one for Jesus, as it were.

In order for all of this to work, the hierarchy must limit the contact of the flock with the outside world, and barring that, make sure they discount anything not heard from within the four walls of the church. Most everything must be pastor approved, never mind that pastor has had almost no education that would make him understand more than how to create another church of his denomination or how to manipulate his flock. Maybe he can be of service, but that is conditional in an atmosphere that promotes the unconditional nature of love and acceptance…..don’t you believe it! There are conditions.

You may wonder what today triggered such a musing and what it has to do with the political scene. Fair enough. I read about Scalia and his gestures. Profane gestures from within a church no less. And, from within the Catholic church, who so far seems to be the first, we can only hope of many, to take the heat for the abuses that are occurring there. I would love to see this information spread far and wide along side pictures of George Bush, Jr. using similar gestures. I guess Antonin also told his critics to “go get fucked up the butt.” Nice touch, Tony. But, not surprising, not at all.

You see Christians are in love with irascible characters. They are suckers for a convert. They love the bad gone good. I feel for them. They are unwittingly conned so often. They want so much to be special. I can’t blame them. But, Scalia is just one guy and not that different from any other. Problem is that Christians love that pedestal thing, no matter how small. They have just never gotten the idea that they are just ordinary people. Like so many of starting out, they just want to believe they are special, that they have some divine plan for their lives. They cannot stand the ordinariness of existence, the responsibility of it all. For this reason, they must have leaders of monumental proportions and they must have destinies…large ones, delusions of grandeur type ones. I am sorry for that. It is not easy to come to grips with one’s powerlessness in this great universe.

It is not so much that it cheers me to see people fall from the pedestal, as I want the Christians to awaken from their collective slumber and shake off their childishness, the same childishness that is keeping us from moving on and getting really good work done that would benefit the world. I want them to understand that it is ok to be ordinary as long as you understand that everyone else is too. There is no grand plan, there is no pristine leadership. If they could do that, they might begin to understand their place in Democracy. They might give up their delusions of theocracy. I wish more than anything they could understand that the trust they currently have in their “godly” judges is so misplaced that they might as well embrace Scalias gesture as personal. As much as Scalia is telling the media to fuck off, he and so many others like him are so much more putting the screws to the faithful, they just don’t know it.

I wish someone could figure out how to tell them they are being used. Turns out they are not better than anyone else, and really, they have a long way to travel to smart.


-Mags