A Desperate And Flailing Romney Goes On A Deranged Elephant Hunt

Little Miss Mormon Silver Spoon has his allies fighting back against the Hershey Bar Whore. A bunch of fat empty suits-- led by Sununu and Christie-- were all over the media yesterday bashing Gingrich. A deranged religious sect in Iowa put up a TV ad warning Iowans that Gingrich changed religions and is now-- Oh God, no!-- a Roman Catholic. Are the Republicans getting ready to fight the 30 Years War again? And is religion the field on which Romney, who many of the more backward Republicans (i.e., the Iowa base) see as a member of a satanic cult, wants to engage? A pro-Romney super-PAC launched an ad today warning that "Newt has a ton of baggage." (This Newt ditty is more entertaining.) And if you really want to get into pure absurdity, Romney cronies are readying a blistering new ad for lo-info Iowa Republicans that says Gingrich has spent "30 years in Washington flip-flopping on issues." It's true of course, but-- like religion-- flip-flopping isn't the best field of battle for Willard M. Romney.

And then there's this one below that the Romney campaign itself launched, attacking Newt for his slip-up a few months ago when he admitted publicly that Paul Ryan's plan to destroy Medicare is "right-wing social engineering." Every Republican who is motivated by the stirring adolescent thoughts of Ayn Rand is bound to turn against the former disgraced Speaker and blowhard for that sin! Or at least that's what Romney is counting on. In which case, does Sarah Palin step in or does someone else become the Anyone-But-Mitt candidate?

The motive is pretty simple: Republicans are dangerously close to having none of their candidates be acceptable to both rank-and-file voters and the party establishment. It’s not quite clear what happens when this is the case; there is no particularly good precedent for it. But since finding a nominee who is broadly acceptable to different party constituencies is the foremost goal of any party during its nomination process, it seems distinctly possible that Republicans might begin to look elsewhere.

And, for the curious, if you're looking around for where Romney himself stands on Paul Ryan's plan to end Medicare... keep lookin'. Or don't; no one, apparently, will ever know-- until after the election.